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[SIZE=+2]HELLO MY NAME IS DAN AND JESUS FUCKING ROCKS! IF YOU HATE JESUS YOU'RE PROBABLY A FUCKING ASSHOLE QUEER WHO'S GOING TO HELL FOR BEING FUCKING DUMB! SCREW YOU!
THIS IS ME U FAGS
I AM HERE TO TELL YOU ABOUT HOW GODDAMN COOL JESUS IS BECAUSE HE'S GOT THESE SUPER POWERS LIKE LASER EYES AND IF YOU SIN HE WILL COME DOWN TO YOUR HOUSE AND BEAT YOUR ASS WITH A LEAD PIPE!
HAHAHA FUCK U SINNER HAHAHA EAT SOME FUCKING LASERS AND JUSTICE
OKAY SO LIKE EASTER IS HERE WITH SOME PUSSY LAME BUNNY THAT HOPS AROUND AND HE'S LIKE "OOH I'M A MAMMAL I HAVE EGGS BUT I SHOULDN'T BECAUSE I'M NOT A PLATYPUS BUT LOOK THEY'RE ALL THESE COLORS AND OH MY GOD EAT CANDY" WELL FUCK YOU BUNNY JESUS COULD KILL YOU BECAUSE YOU'RE WRONG LIKE THE MUSLIMS AND HITLER! DIE DIE DIE!
HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT BUNNY! HARHAR LOOKS LIKE YOU DON'T HAVE BULLET-PROOF EGGS!
SO ANYWAY I WAS READING THIS BOOK CALLED THE BIBLE (MAYBE YOU'VE HEARD OF IT) AND I DISCOVERED HOW TOTALLY FUCKING BADASS JESUS WAS BECAUSE THERE WAS THIS BASKET THING AND HE'S ALL LIKE "I'M GONNA PULL A BUNCH OF FUCKING BREAD AND FISH OUTTA THIS BITCH AND FEED YO ASS HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT" BECAUSE HE'S THE SON OF GOD AND YOU'RE FUCKING NOT! YOU HAVE STUPID GAY NORMAL PARENTS LOSER! HAHAAHHAHAHA JESUS OWNZ YOU!
OH YEAH, WHEN'S THE LAST FUCKING TIME YOU CAME BACK FROM THE DEAD? HOW ABOUT....NEVER@!#$)(!@)#()@#(!@!)!(!@#)!@(!@
HAHAHAHA, TAKE THAT JEWS OR ROMANS OR MARTIANS OR WHATEVER YOU ARE!
THERE'S A BUNCH OF OTHER STUPID STUFF IN THE BIBLE BUT NONE OF IT IS AS FUCKING SWEET AS JESUS!! HOLY SHIT! THE JEWS ARE ALL LIKE "OH BUT WHAT ABOUT THAT MOSES GUY THAT LIKE PARTED THE SEA WITH HIS MIND!" WELL JESUS COULD KICK MOSES' ASS IN A FIGHT BIGTIME! NO CONTEST!