Troll Kingdom

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Asswipes

How dare you mock one of Allah's chosen people! For this we shall smite you like all the other infidels!

[YOUTUBE]eNtDrUhcKyQ[/YOUTUBE]

Shiver in fear of our awesome might of Islamic Powers! Also ignore all the stuff about caving into terrorists that totally undermines this message.
 
Be a man, use your hand!

So this traveling salesman is out in the boonies and he has to take a crap somethin fierce. He rolls up to a farmhouse and asks to use their john.

"We don't have running water, mister. All wee got is the outhouse," the farmer informs him, pointing towards said facilities. “We aint got no fancy terlet paper neither. Gonna have to use you hands.”

“My hands? Are you serious? How the hell am I supposed to clean them without running water?”

“There’s a hole out the side. Stick ‘em out there, it’ll clean ‘em right up.”

Not having time to find other accommodations, the salesman sprints to the outhouse and does his business. When he finishes, he sticks his hand through the hole, as instructed.

Outside and unseen, the farmers son is waiting with two huge rocks. When he sees the hands, he quickly smashes them in between the stones.

In sudden pain and without thinking, the salesman jams his fingers in his mouth.
 
How many of you use a moist towelettes to finish the job when youre done wiping, or at least a little soap and water on the toilet paper?

You should. If you got shit on your hand, would you just wipe it off, or would you wash your hands?

Start using moist towelettes to finish cleaning yourself after every number two. No need to thank me, you nasty fuckers.
 
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