Dual Liberation Army E-Zine: Issue #1

[TheResurrect0r]

Bomb Blast Rocks the Sticks

By Don Dualski, Associated Press Writer
Mon Oct 10, 5:01 AM ET

THE STICKS - An elderly woman narrowly averted being blown to bits today by a car-bomb, hidden in her car. She survived without injury.

The old woman, who has asked that her real name remain anonymous, goes under the internet moniker mismanners and maintains an internet forum for self-described internet "trolls."

Police believe this to be the work of the Dual Liberation Army, which has already claimed responsibility for the bombing. The note left behind reads as follows:

WE WILL NOT REST UNTIL ALL DUALS HAVE BEEN LIBERATED FROM THE SHACKLES OF TEH (sic) RULING GREEN ELITE

0110100001100101011011000110110001101111

The FBI regard the DLA as being the most powerful and mysterious terrorist organization ever conceived. "They come straight out of a comic book, these guys" , remarked agent O'Flannigan.

Police recommend that all necessary precautions be taken.

 

[TKers-are-shit]

If I was a dual, I'd be with you 100%!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[BitchSlapSmitty]

Ugh! ALL THIS E-ZINE TALK! PRINT THE MOTHERFUCKERS BITCHES!!!

 

[TheResurrect0r]

Hilbert Frakes is now my second in command

 

[Hilbert Frakes]

Horray! Bow down to us fuckers!

 

[Sarek]

Cool. Another rag to line the catbox with.