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Hey, Luuuucy, I'm Hoooome!

Donovan

beer, I want beer
I feel slighted. My friend Louisville Slugger, Satan's Choadchugger, is online responding to multiple posts, but doesn't want to discuss the relative merits of whether he sucks worse than Scotland, or vice versa.


Don't you like me anymore, Saint Thomas of the Virgin Asshats? Am I not evil enough to follow in the imaginary footsteps of the cartoon devil you pretend to worship? I went and got me a pitchfork!

Am I not stupid enough to fit in the ranks? I swear I can pretend I'm a retard like you, ask anybody here! They've seen it. I can even drool while I post, because the inferior quality of Scotch Whisky gives me anaphylactic shock. Of course, the effect would be lost on you, but I give you my word. I'm sure you're already drooling: the least I can do is match wits that way.

If you like, I'll even whack myself in the head with a ballpeen hammer, kind of even the odds a little for you. I'll keep all pop culture references to old episodes of Are you being Served (Again?) so you'll get the stupefyingly dull humor and pompous british affectation part...we can be pals, you and me.
 
Donovan said:
I feel slighted. My friend Louisville Slugger, Satan's Choadchugger, is online responding to multiple posts, but doesn't want to discuss the relative merits of whether he sucks worse than Scotland, or vice versa.


Don't you like me anymore, Saint Thomas of the Virgin Asshats? Am I not evil enough to follow in the imaginary footsteps of the cartoon devil you pretend to worship? I went and got me a pitchfork!

Am I not stupid enough to fit in the ranks? I swear I can pretend I'm a retard like you, ask anybody here! They've seen it. I can even drool while I post, because the inferior quality of Scotch Whisky gives me anaphylactic shock. Of course, the effect would be lost on you, but I give you my word. I'm sure you're already drooling: the least I can do is match wits that way.

If you like, I'll even whack myself in the head with a ballpeen hammer, kind of even the odds a little for you. I'll keep all pop culture references to old episodes of Are you being Served (Again?) so you'll get the stupefyingly dull humor and pompous british affectation part...we can be pals, you and me.


Incredible. I wounded this fool's feelings more than I had first suspected. How very awful of me. He has finally realised his attempts at mocking Scots have been wasted ever since my post listing the achievements of my people, unmatched anywhere else on the planet. He also remains upset upon learning that my people have kept the heels of their jackboots pressed squarely upon the necks of his people for over 800 years and continue to do so even today. The child has learned his people are but a joke upon this world. No wonder his country's favourite colour is green, the very same colour as the eye of the monster known to the world as jealousy.
 
Yay, Lucy's in the Sky! Hey, I think we heard the "Jackboot" story before. You got Tourette's or something? You're stuttering.

Probably all them Vietnamese and Iraquis you been letting play with your mighty schlong. You should look for a clinic, they got shots that'll help...
 
Donovan said:
Yay, Lucy's in the Sky! Hey, I think we heard the "Jackboot" story before. You got Tourette's or something? You're stuttering.

Probably all them Vietnamese and Iraquis you been letting play with your mighty schlong. You should look for a clinic, they got shots that'll help...

I am most pleased you see fit to recall the content of every post I complete. I have gained a follower. Not very comforting when one learns how many psychotic individuals roam the planet out there. Perhaps this is one such individual, scorned as he has been by his mommy. (heh heh @ 'all them Vietnamese'). Such a display of incredible intellect. (heh heh @ 'you got Tourettes..). I am truly in awe of his intellect. Rather places me in the low percentile no doubt.
 
OMG NKILL HATRE REND MAIM DESTROY FUCK SHIT COCK CUNT MSATERBAIT RAZEE BLOWED UP BROKEND ASSHAT FILERW SHITE MJUNCH IN TEH CIRCUMFERENSE of DER 7TH RIGN OF HADES!
 
Surely, old chap, you've heard of writing with 'voice'?
Dialects, old boy, quite the rage in Europe this year.

The scorned by mommy stuff hurt, though. She was a fine Vietnamese woman with Tourettes syndrome, and for you to mock her memory like this...

Devil-worshipper or not, that's just plain rude.
 
Gagh said:
Scotland = Sitting Target.


Hey Gagh, do you Brits still get to go over to Scotland and steal their homes, rape their women and disembowel their Australian actors? Cuz that sounds like good times...I'd change nationality if I'm still allowed to mindlessly invade foreign countries...
 
Donovan said:
Hey Gagh, do you Brits still get to go over to Scotland and steal their homes, rape their women and disembowel their Australian actors? Cuz that sounds like good times...I'd change nationality if I'm still allowed to mindlessly invade foreign countries...


No. We leave Third World countries alone, now.

BTW: 'Brits' refers to Britain, thereby including Scotland. You mean 'English'.
 
Gagh said:
No. We leave Third World countries alone, now.

BTW: 'Brits' refers to Britain, thereby including Scotland. You mean 'English'.

Sorry. Hey I could probably help you with the whole Scotland problem, we in America have developed a very liberal and progressive system for fixing our ghettos...you got any levees in Scotland?
 
Gagh said:
No. We leave Third World countries alone, now.

BTW: 'Brits' refers to Britain, thereby including Scotland. You mean 'English'.

I have tried to explain 'Britain' to him many times. He is not very bright. As for Scotland being a Third-World country, strange that most inventions came from there. I also find it odd most of the shipping, including military warships, are built in Scotland. What's the matter? English too stupid to learn shipbuilding??
 
Nope. I'm from the Portsmouth region, and we seem to do a pretty good job of building ships down here, so there goes that defence.
 
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