I'm Not a Pervert

[Gonad]

Once I took a needle-less syringe and filled it with water and stuck it all up my butt so I could have diarreah.

I've put deep heating rub on my penis.

I've put my penis in a vacuum cleaner hose and used it to masturbate (old hat)

I've stuck a toothbrush up my butt.

I've put a toy pool cue (smaller than a pencil) up my butt.

But I'm not a pervert.

I'm an explorer.

 

[Mentalist]

Thats nice.

 

[Gonad]

Once when I was five or so I wanted to press a knife to my penis because I was curious. I knew my parents would catch me and punish me so I decided to sneak into the kitchen late at night to do it. So when I went to bed at bedtime I pulled my pajamas down to my knees so that they'd be down when I woke up in the middle of the night to remind me of what I had to do. But I didn't wake up that night, so I never got to put the knife to my penis, for which I am eternally grateful.

 

[VKD1]

I once ejaculated in the confession booth of a church and left my mess behind.