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It's official, I'm a chump.

Laker_Girl

Mrs. Big Dick McGee
So my friend just had her baby (I thought we were "best friends" but clearly we are not) and it seems I will be the last person allowed to meet her son.

I was the first person she told she was pregnant, even before the father. Hell, she came to my house to take the home pregnancy test. I am the only person that knows she and her married boyfriend purposely went on fertility drugs to GET pregnant and this wasn't an accident. I was the only friend there for her when her boyfriend left her, pregnant and alone, to "work things out with his wife." I threw her a beautiful baby shower, mostly on my own dime but gave equal credit to her other friend and mom. I've spent more money on manicures, pedicures, gifts for the baby, gifts for her, dinners, breakfasts, lunches, and movies than I care to even think about and won't even get into all the money she insisted would be a "loan" and has yet to pay back. When it came to who was going to be in the delivery room with her did she ask me? OH GOD NO! She asked her other friend because she is a "more consistant friend", nevermind the fact that I was the one she was heavily leaning on for support, financially and emotionally. I was hurt but I let it go and continued to be as good a friend to her as ever. Fate stepped in and my friend ended up having a C-section so her friend wasn't allowed in to see the birth anyway, just her mother. That was good for me, not that I would have ever wished that, I wouldn't but it was quite a coincidence. Unfortunately the baby was born with some sort of infection and has been in the hospital for a week now, my friend was discharged last Sunday. I stupidly thought I should lay low, give my friend time to rest and lots of space but all that got me was another slap in the face. Her son is coming home today and when I asked if I could come over and maybe meet him Saturday she said to me, "Well, I don't know, there are a lot of people that have to meet him first."

Yep, I'm an idiot. I am trying so hard not to build a wall between myself and people, I'm trying to stay as loving and compassionate as I've always been but this kind of thing is just one more brick.

Thanks for the space to rant. :bigass: Now feel free to bash me!
 
I actually have compassion for the rejection of good will, and find your gift of spirit to be the essence of what Christmas is all about.

Many blessings to you Laker Girl. I'm sorry your friend is so clueless. I have a friend like you in my life (that isn't my wife) and I cherish the friendship.
 
Laker_Girl said:
So my friend just had her baby (I thought we were "best friends" but clearly we are not) and it seems I will be the last person allowed to meet her son.

I was the first person she told she was pregnant, even before the father. Hell, she came to my house to take the home pregnancy test. I am the only person that knows she and her married boyfriend purposely went on fertility drugs to GET pregnant and this wasn't an accident. I was the only friend there for her when her boyfriend left her, pregnant and alone, to "work things out with his wife." I threw her a beautiful baby shower, mostly on my own dime but gave equal credit to her other friend and mom. I've spent more money on manicures, pedicures, gifts for the baby, gifts for her, dinners, breakfasts, lunches, and movies than I care to even think about and won't even get into all the money she insisted would be a "loan" and has yet to pay back. When it came to who was going to be in the delivery room with her did she ask me? OH GOD NO! She asked her other friend because she is a "more consistant friend", nevermind the fact that I was the one she was heavily leaning on for support, financially and emotionally. I was hurt but I let it go and continued to be as good a friend to her as ever. Fate stepped in and my friend ended up having a C-section so her friend wasn't allowed in to see the birth anyway, just her mother. That was good for me, not that I would have ever wished that, I wouldn't but it was quite a coincidence. Unfortunately the baby was born with some sort of infection and has been in the hospital for a week now, my friend was discharged last Sunday. I stupidly thought I should lay low, give my friend time to rest and lots of space but all that got me was another slap in the face. Her son is coming home today and when I asked if I could come over and maybe meet him Saturday she said to me, "Well, I don't know, there are a lot of people that have to meet him first."

Yep, I'm an idiot. I am trying so hard not to build a wall between myself and people, I'm trying to stay as loving and compassionate as I've always been but this kind of thing is just one more brick.

Thanks for the space to rant. :bigass: Now feel free to bash me!

It appears that no matter what you did for this "friend" or how nice you were, she was always going to treat you bad. Like you said, maybe it was just fate. I know it's hard, but you sound like the better person, so I would give up on the whole thing. I'm sure you have other friends that would appreciate your friendship.

I have had alot of similar things happen to me. It started to get really old being the "not as liked" friend. So I gave up. I no longer have any female friends since they have all turned out to be bitches. It's easier to just have male friends since they don't go bitchy on you every month when they are on the rag.
 
Laker_Girl said:
So my friend just had her baby (I thought we were "best friends" but clearly we are not) and it seems I will be the last person allowed to meet her son.

I was the first person she told she was pregnant, even before the father. Hell, she came to my house to take the home pregnancy test. I am the only person that knows she and her married boyfriend purposely went on fertility drugs to GET pregnant and this wasn't an accident. I was the only friend there for her when her boyfriend left her, pregnant and alone, to "work things out with his wife." I threw her a beautiful baby shower, mostly on my own dime but gave equal credit to her other friend and mom. I've spent more money on manicures, pedicures, gifts for the baby, gifts for her, dinners, breakfasts, lunches, and movies than I care to even think about and won't even get into all the money she insisted would be a "loan" and has yet to pay back. When it came to who was going to be in the delivery room with her did she ask me? OH GOD NO! She asked her other friend because she is a "more consistant friend", nevermind the fact that I was the one she was heavily leaning on for support, financially and emotionally. I was hurt but I let it go and continued to be as good a friend to her as ever. Fate stepped in and my friend ended up having a C-section so her friend wasn't allowed in to see the birth anyway, just her mother. That was good for me, not that I would have ever wished that, I wouldn't but it was quite a coincidence. Unfortunately the baby was born with some sort of infection and has been in the hospital for a week now, my friend was discharged last Sunday. I stupidly thought I should lay low, give my friend time to rest and lots of space but all that got me was another slap in the face. Her son is coming home today and when I asked if I could come over and maybe meet him Saturday she said to me, "Well, I don't know, there are a lot of people that have to meet him first."

Yep, I'm an idiot. I am trying so hard not to build a wall between myself and people, I'm trying to stay as loving and compassionate as I've always been but this kind of thing is just one more brick.

Thanks for the space to rant. :bigass: Now feel free to bash me!
Damn. It's too late to say TL;DR.
 
Maybe those people who need to meet him "first" are relatives. Dont be so hard on her. Family always comes before freinds.
 
I've treated her better than anyone in her family except for maybe her mother and knowing her mother as I do, she'd be appalled at my friend's behavior.

Regardless, Miss Tanner is correct and just made the point I always do, women are bitches.

I need to find better friends, with the exception of my lifelong friend Sara and my boyfriend, I always end up mothering my friends and that's bullshit.
 
Oh, and another thing...Where were all of these much more important people the night my friend's baby was born, hmmmm? Had he not been sick I would have gotten to hold him that night! I think my "friend" is just pissed now that I didn't ditch my niece and nephew to cater to her while her son's been in the hospital. So if she wants to play a tit-for-a-tat she's going to fucked like a dutch whore when she wants to go back to school, I'll be too busy to baby-sit.
 
Laker_Girl said:
So if she wants to play a tit-for-a-tat she's going to fucked like a dutch whore when she wants to go back to school, I'll be too busy to baby-sit.

Some dipshits aren't good enough to be recipients of your kindness. Remember that.

Don't give in on your resolution; you will only be used like a cheap trick yet again.
 
Sometimes we just want people to love us back the way we love them. People suck -- this is not a reserved behavior for bitchy two-faced women.

I say, drop this so-called psudo-friend like yesterday's disease-laden Kleenex and never go back. You do know you can't ever go back, right? Once a person has shown the quarter inch depth to their personality, you can't ever bring them up to an inch and a half. . .not even!

Make this your New Year's resolution: No more being taken advantage of by those people not worthy of your contempt, let alone your largesse. Save the latter for people who really appreciate your kind heart, and the former for this poor excuse for a fungus laden pod person.

Now, don't turn on us later on just because she decides to throw you a crumb. Accept the reality of this non-friendship. You were used by her and that's the harsh and naked truth. That's why it hurts so much.

If you want revenge, don't forget, Plan B always (always) works. But you have to be ruthless in its execution. You are friendly, but distant, midly interested, but too busy to ever be involved. Drives people like her crazy because she can't manipulate you like she could in the past. You simply dance away every time she tries to inveigle herself into your good graces. This can be an entertaining game in and of itself, especially if while being friendly, but distantly out of reach, you regale her with stories of your generosity with a new friend (who really doesn't exist).



See, even a dyed-in-the-wool Goody Two-Shoes can be inventively evil when pushed too hard.
 
She doesn't deserve your friendship, plain and simple. I know she's fun to hang out with, you two were always having a ball just going to the movies and dinner and stuff. But we both know she's also a judgemental bitch that can turn on you so fast your head will spin. Remember the "my baby comment" back in June? Believe me, I KNOW what you're going through.

Keep your resolve not to baby sit, I'll help ya be strong, and your boyfriend will too. I know he loves that you have friends that you can hang with besides him, but I'm sure he'll show you extra attention now that you're in need. Keep that pretty chin up, ya heard? :)
 
Laker_Girl said:
I always end up mothering my friends and that's bullshit.

I can see that.
That sucks L_G, sorry to hear that. It may be easy to go away from this person now that they will be otherwise occupied. With friends like that who needs enemies? Focus on those that uplift you, not those that bring you down.
 
All of you have given L.G. great advice. I think it's cool she has alot of friends here on this site. It's also nice to see that when someone is having a real problem and reveals it, they aren't trashed for it. You all are cool.

:)
 
Miss Tanner said:
All of you have given L.G. great advice. I think it's cool she has alot of friends here on this site. It's also nice to see that when someone is having a real problem and reveals it, they aren't trashed for it. You all are cool.

:)

Aw shit, shut the hell up.
 
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