More Ways to Kill Superman

[Punisher]

This occurred to me on the commute home from work yesterday.

It's so simple. You take his whore Lois Lane, give her a time-delayed poison, and put her in a water-tight barrel in the middle of the Atlantic.

Superman hears her screams and rushes to her aid. He gets to her, and of course, she's cold by then. He's pissed. His heat signature sets off a sensor that triggers massive kryptonite explosion with kryponite shrapnel, which lined the interior of the lead-lined explosive barrel.

Superman swims to the surface, bleeding to death, riddled with kryptonite daggers. Face, chest, eyes, he's taken major hits.

Sharks get the scent and attack. It's hard going at first, but they wear him down.

Goodbye Stupidman.

 

[Superman]

Ways to kill The Punisher:

Oh yeah, that's right. Not much of a topic. He's just a human punk with guns and weapons.

I can give you an orbital lobotomy with my heat vision.

But no worries. I won't.

I'm Superman, after all.

Of course, there was that brush with some red kryptonite last week...

\S/

 

[jack]