CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
Johnny never went to funerals. They were a waste of time. He'd never cared about someone enough to want to sit for hours pretending to cry over them. Such a waste of time. Life is for the living. He didn't much like staying still, even for short periods of time. But he would be going to Randy Phoenix's funeral. He had his reasons.
It was not because he had any special affection for Randy Phoenix. In fact, he'd hated him. Phoenix has been sent to developmental territory - where Johnny had been wrestling for six months while he waited to be called up to the big time - after failing a drug test. It was clear that Phoenix didn't want to be there and Johnny could understand that, he didn't want to be there either. Johnny new he was far too good to be wrestling in front of 200 hicks in bingo halls while far less talented men than him were wrestling in front of thousands live and millions on national tv. He wasn't in the developmental territory due to his skill level. It was true that new signees often did a stint in the developmentals, but Johnny has been wrestling for five years before he had signed his PWF contract and could clearly have been put straight on television. No, he had been sent to the developmental territory because of his attitude. It was thought by certain members of PWF management that Johnny was big-headed and needed to be humbled, to be taught how the business worked. Johnny so it differently, of course. He wasn't arrogant, he just knew how good he was. And he was very, very good. Many within the PWF were threatened by that. Such as Randy Phoenix.
As in instructor for the PWF, Phoenix had done little but criticise the work of his students. After every one of Johnny's matches, which always went over very well with the 200 hicks in attendance, Randy would always have a long list of things that Johnny had done "wrong" in the match. The list was complete crap, of course. Randy was just bitter, he had just turned forty, he'd been busted for cocaine and steroid use, he had suffered a heart scare a year before (no doubt due to said drug abuse), had lost his "spot" on the main roster and Johnny could do moves that Phoenix hadn't been able to do even twenty years ago. He would always send reports up to management saying that Johnny still wasn't ready to move up to the main roster, that his attitude problems still existed. But now he was dead. And Johnny had gotten the call from Jim Floss, head of talent relations, on the morning of the funeral that he was being called up to the PWF roster, along with Gary-Michael. Floss was actually Phoenix's brother in law, so Johnny had told him how sorry he was about what had happened, which he seemed to appreciate.
It wasn't because of Gary-Michael either that Johnny would be attending Phoenix's funeral. Gary-Michael Hawthorne, or GMH as he called himself (his theory was that using initials would instantly making him popular, as it was easy for the fans to chant the three letters) was the closest thing Johnny had to a friend. They had went to high school together, in fact, and then wrestling school. GMH was nowhere near as talent as Johnny, that was plain to see, but he was six inches taller and his body was of a type more valued by PWF management (in that he was hugely muscular.) Johnny would look out for GMH in the ring sometimes, carrying him through matches, offering him advice on how to improve his performances (advice usually disguised as insults, but still advice.) GMH would watch out for Johnny OUTSIDE of the ring. He was always trying to explain to people that Johnny wasn't an ego-maniac, it was just the way he was and his sense of humour. He even tried to defend Johnny to Randy Phoenix once, but Phoenix hated GMH as much as he hated Johnny and that didn't end well.
GMH had been trying to convince Johnny to come to the funeral almost as soon as Phoenix had died. Management hadn't ordered them to attend or anything, but it was expected of all the students who had worked under Phoenix in the developmentals to attend. GMH thought that if Johnny didn't go it would hurt his chances in the PWF and only reinforce the idea of his huge ego. Johnny didn't care though. He knew that management wouldn't be able to ignore his talent forever.
No, it was simply because he thought some shit would go down at the funeral that Johnny wanted to attend. Phoenix had been wrestling for over twenty years before his death, all over the world. He'd wrestled with some of the biggest personalities in the history of the sport. Many of them would be attending the funeral. Not all of them had like Randy Phoenix. That could be interesting. Johnny was interested in watching human behaviour.
"Okay, I'll go to the funeral," he said to GMH. "It could be fun." GMH just looked at him in shock.
Johnny was happy with his seat, at the back, because he could watch everyone else from there. Indeed there were many huge names there. There was tension between many of them. But nothing interesting was happening. Johnny was disappointed. There was no action.
"They're so boring!" he said to GMH, who was of course sitting beside him. "What is this, a funeral?"
It went on that way. Several wrestlers paid tribute to him. None of them really said much specific, just that he was a good man, a God-fearing many, a respected professional...lies, of course. Johnny was just ready to duck out when a young woman stood up and walked to the front. A young pregnant woman.
"Do you want to know what kind of a man Randy Phoenix really was?" she asked. "I'll tell you! He was the kind of man who would sleep with me at seventeen, that's illegal in my state by the way, tell me he LOVED me then leave without even speaking to me in the morning! And he never came back! By the time the PWF came back to my town he'd be demoted to the minor leagues for using drugs! I noticed none of you mentioned that by the way, probably because you're all on coke and roids yourself! Get your hands off me! I'm pregnant, you bastards, eight months pregnant...and it's his! IT'S HIS!" She was dragged away. Johnny smiled broadly and turned to GMH.
"That was great!" he said.
"Great!?" asked GMH. "It was horrible!"
"Come on, how many funeral have pregnant ring rats doing a tell all on the deceased? Great fun!"
"Phoenix's wife and children are here!" said GMH.
"Do you think I give a fuck?" asked Johnny, laughing. "Hey, is that Randy's daughter up at the front, crying? The blond?"
"Yeah..."
"I'd hit it! What age is she, 16, 17?"
"She's fifteen," said the person sitting right in front of Johnny, a person he'd paid no attention to, his eyes had been so busy moving about the room trying to spy all the bigs names in attendance. The man turned round. It was Jim Floss. "She's fifteen and her dad's just died."
"I...Jim...I didn't know you were...shit," said Johnny.
"Shit's right, son," said Floss, calmly. "You're trip up to the PWF is cancelled."
"Jim, please...I was just...I'm sorry!" said Johnny.
"Too late," said Floss. "I'm going to suggest to the boss that he release you from your contract altogether."
"No, you can't...YOU OLD BASTARD!" said Johnny, standing up. GMH tried to pull him back down. All eyes turned now to look at Johnny. "I'm Johnny Wonder! Wrestling personified! I'm better than all of you!"
"And you don't have a job now," said Floss. Johnny thought about this for a moment. He looked around at all the stars looking at him, some he'd been watch since he was a child.
He punched out Jim Floss.
Johnny left the funeral of Randy Phoenix in a police car. GMH did not go to the station to bail him out. In fact he didn't even call.
It was not because he had any special affection for Randy Phoenix. In fact, he'd hated him. Phoenix has been sent to developmental territory - where Johnny had been wrestling for six months while he waited to be called up to the big time - after failing a drug test. It was clear that Phoenix didn't want to be there and Johnny could understand that, he didn't want to be there either. Johnny new he was far too good to be wrestling in front of 200 hicks in bingo halls while far less talented men than him were wrestling in front of thousands live and millions on national tv. He wasn't in the developmental territory due to his skill level. It was true that new signees often did a stint in the developmentals, but Johnny has been wrestling for five years before he had signed his PWF contract and could clearly have been put straight on television. No, he had been sent to the developmental territory because of his attitude. It was thought by certain members of PWF management that Johnny was big-headed and needed to be humbled, to be taught how the business worked. Johnny so it differently, of course. He wasn't arrogant, he just knew how good he was. And he was very, very good. Many within the PWF were threatened by that. Such as Randy Phoenix.
As in instructor for the PWF, Phoenix had done little but criticise the work of his students. After every one of Johnny's matches, which always went over very well with the 200 hicks in attendance, Randy would always have a long list of things that Johnny had done "wrong" in the match. The list was complete crap, of course. Randy was just bitter, he had just turned forty, he'd been busted for cocaine and steroid use, he had suffered a heart scare a year before (no doubt due to said drug abuse), had lost his "spot" on the main roster and Johnny could do moves that Phoenix hadn't been able to do even twenty years ago. He would always send reports up to management saying that Johnny still wasn't ready to move up to the main roster, that his attitude problems still existed. But now he was dead. And Johnny had gotten the call from Jim Floss, head of talent relations, on the morning of the funeral that he was being called up to the PWF roster, along with Gary-Michael. Floss was actually Phoenix's brother in law, so Johnny had told him how sorry he was about what had happened, which he seemed to appreciate.
It wasn't because of Gary-Michael either that Johnny would be attending Phoenix's funeral. Gary-Michael Hawthorne, or GMH as he called himself (his theory was that using initials would instantly making him popular, as it was easy for the fans to chant the three letters) was the closest thing Johnny had to a friend. They had went to high school together, in fact, and then wrestling school. GMH was nowhere near as talent as Johnny, that was plain to see, but he was six inches taller and his body was of a type more valued by PWF management (in that he was hugely muscular.) Johnny would look out for GMH in the ring sometimes, carrying him through matches, offering him advice on how to improve his performances (advice usually disguised as insults, but still advice.) GMH would watch out for Johnny OUTSIDE of the ring. He was always trying to explain to people that Johnny wasn't an ego-maniac, it was just the way he was and his sense of humour. He even tried to defend Johnny to Randy Phoenix once, but Phoenix hated GMH as much as he hated Johnny and that didn't end well.
GMH had been trying to convince Johnny to come to the funeral almost as soon as Phoenix had died. Management hadn't ordered them to attend or anything, but it was expected of all the students who had worked under Phoenix in the developmentals to attend. GMH thought that if Johnny didn't go it would hurt his chances in the PWF and only reinforce the idea of his huge ego. Johnny didn't care though. He knew that management wouldn't be able to ignore his talent forever.
No, it was simply because he thought some shit would go down at the funeral that Johnny wanted to attend. Phoenix had been wrestling for over twenty years before his death, all over the world. He'd wrestled with some of the biggest personalities in the history of the sport. Many of them would be attending the funeral. Not all of them had like Randy Phoenix. That could be interesting. Johnny was interested in watching human behaviour.
"Okay, I'll go to the funeral," he said to GMH. "It could be fun." GMH just looked at him in shock.
Johnny was happy with his seat, at the back, because he could watch everyone else from there. Indeed there were many huge names there. There was tension between many of them. But nothing interesting was happening. Johnny was disappointed. There was no action.
"They're so boring!" he said to GMH, who was of course sitting beside him. "What is this, a funeral?"
It went on that way. Several wrestlers paid tribute to him. None of them really said much specific, just that he was a good man, a God-fearing many, a respected professional...lies, of course. Johnny was just ready to duck out when a young woman stood up and walked to the front. A young pregnant woman.
"Do you want to know what kind of a man Randy Phoenix really was?" she asked. "I'll tell you! He was the kind of man who would sleep with me at seventeen, that's illegal in my state by the way, tell me he LOVED me then leave without even speaking to me in the morning! And he never came back! By the time the PWF came back to my town he'd be demoted to the minor leagues for using drugs! I noticed none of you mentioned that by the way, probably because you're all on coke and roids yourself! Get your hands off me! I'm pregnant, you bastards, eight months pregnant...and it's his! IT'S HIS!" She was dragged away. Johnny smiled broadly and turned to GMH.
"That was great!" he said.
"Great!?" asked GMH. "It was horrible!"
"Come on, how many funeral have pregnant ring rats doing a tell all on the deceased? Great fun!"
"Phoenix's wife and children are here!" said GMH.
"Do you think I give a fuck?" asked Johnny, laughing. "Hey, is that Randy's daughter up at the front, crying? The blond?"
"Yeah..."
"I'd hit it! What age is she, 16, 17?"
"She's fifteen," said the person sitting right in front of Johnny, a person he'd paid no attention to, his eyes had been so busy moving about the room trying to spy all the bigs names in attendance. The man turned round. It was Jim Floss. "She's fifteen and her dad's just died."
"I...Jim...I didn't know you were...shit," said Johnny.
"Shit's right, son," said Floss, calmly. "You're trip up to the PWF is cancelled."
"Jim, please...I was just...I'm sorry!" said Johnny.
"Too late," said Floss. "I'm going to suggest to the boss that he release you from your contract altogether."
"No, you can't...YOU OLD BASTARD!" said Johnny, standing up. GMH tried to pull him back down. All eyes turned now to look at Johnny. "I'm Johnny Wonder! Wrestling personified! I'm better than all of you!"
"And you don't have a job now," said Floss. Johnny thought about this for a moment. He looked around at all the stars looking at him, some he'd been watch since he was a child.
He punched out Jim Floss.
Johnny left the funeral of Randy Phoenix in a police car. GMH did not go to the station to bail him out. In fact he didn't even call.
