CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
The overlords were nervous about their meeting with God. Overlord 2 tried to make out it was no big deal.
"God is just what we call him because he's so old,"said 2. "He's not REALLY God..."
"Don't say that, he'll hear!" said 1.
"Oh come on," said 2. "When was the last time he listened to anything you said or thought?"
"It's been many ages. Great civilisations have risedn and fallen. But still...he has that ability."
"YOU ARE RIGHT TO BE WARY, 1," said God, appearing in their heads.
TRANSCRIPT BELOW
1: G...God.
God: IT IS I.
2: Hi, God.
1: Please, ignore his disrespectful tone...
God: I do not require respect. Only the truth. You have sent a solar system through a black hole without asking me first. Why?
2: The local supervisor and his subordinate were fucking around. The planet, the solar system, it was a right-off. We thought it would be interesting to send them through a black hole. Why not, eh!
1: We...we gave it more thought than that.
2: Not really.
God: SILENCE. This is an outrage. What gave you the right?
2: We was bored, man!
1: Two!
2: Oh come on. Like God's never fucked around? What about all those Jesuses he fathered? You interfere all the time, God!
God: My reasons for fathering so many sons are my own. You answer to me, still. Have you nothing to say in your defence?
2: Only that you're not God.
1: Oh, fuck.
God: No? I'm just, how did you put it..."really old"?
2: Essentially, yes. You lived through the prevous universe. All the way through. And were reborn in this one as the oldst and most powerful entity. That's impressive, it really is. But you didn't create the universe. You can influence it, but it would exist without you. And you weren't "God" in your previous universe. Just a thing...
God: My previous universe is beyond your comprehension, child. Do not try to understand what I was there.
2: Even so...
God: You know that time began with this universe, don't you? That all of time was once compressed to a single point. And then in the Big Bang it spread out, sped up, and this universe began. So answer me this. If there was no time before the Big Bang...how did I exist" before" the universe?
2: I...
1: He knows not what he says, God.
God: No. Let me show him.
2: What did you do?
God: I erased 1 from existence.
2: ...what? 1? 1! Say something, 1! Please! I...I can't feel his mind. Nowhere. It's not even as if he has gone somewherre else....he has no mind!
God: I was the First, yes. I was the only life in the universe and as the universe expanded, so did I. And I was in every other life that was born. A part of me. I can snuff you all out like candles at any time.
2: But...what 1? He was a believer...
God: He was weak and never impacted the universe. Not like you. I let you live because you have some small importance. But know that I can end you at any moment.
2: Yes...yes God.
God: Now. You must go to Earth. You must undo what you have done. You must put that whole solar system back where it belongs.
2: But how? The Black Hole is truly random, I don't even know where Earth will end up...
God: Figure it out yourself. Or I will kill you.
2: ...I'm so sorry. 1, I'm so sorry. Please...tell me you can bring him back.
God: No. I can't. And even if I could...I woulnd't. I am a cruel God. Never forget.
2: I won't...I won't...
"God is just what we call him because he's so old,"said 2. "He's not REALLY God..."
"Don't say that, he'll hear!" said 1.
"Oh come on," said 2. "When was the last time he listened to anything you said or thought?"
"It's been many ages. Great civilisations have risedn and fallen. But still...he has that ability."
"YOU ARE RIGHT TO BE WARY, 1," said God, appearing in their heads.
TRANSCRIPT BELOW
1: G...God.
God: IT IS I.
2: Hi, God.
1: Please, ignore his disrespectful tone...
God: I do not require respect. Only the truth. You have sent a solar system through a black hole without asking me first. Why?
2: The local supervisor and his subordinate were fucking around. The planet, the solar system, it was a right-off. We thought it would be interesting to send them through a black hole. Why not, eh!
1: We...we gave it more thought than that.
2: Not really.
God: SILENCE. This is an outrage. What gave you the right?
2: We was bored, man!
1: Two!
2: Oh come on. Like God's never fucked around? What about all those Jesuses he fathered? You interfere all the time, God!
God: My reasons for fathering so many sons are my own. You answer to me, still. Have you nothing to say in your defence?
2: Only that you're not God.
1: Oh, fuck.
God: No? I'm just, how did you put it..."really old"?
2: Essentially, yes. You lived through the prevous universe. All the way through. And were reborn in this one as the oldst and most powerful entity. That's impressive, it really is. But you didn't create the universe. You can influence it, but it would exist without you. And you weren't "God" in your previous universe. Just a thing...
God: My previous universe is beyond your comprehension, child. Do not try to understand what I was there.
2: Even so...
God: You know that time began with this universe, don't you? That all of time was once compressed to a single point. And then in the Big Bang it spread out, sped up, and this universe began. So answer me this. If there was no time before the Big Bang...how did I exist" before" the universe?
2: I...
1: He knows not what he says, God.
God: No. Let me show him.
2: What did you do?
God: I erased 1 from existence.
2: ...what? 1? 1! Say something, 1! Please! I...I can't feel his mind. Nowhere. It's not even as if he has gone somewherre else....he has no mind!
God: I was the First, yes. I was the only life in the universe and as the universe expanded, so did I. And I was in every other life that was born. A part of me. I can snuff you all out like candles at any time.
2: But...what 1? He was a believer...
God: He was weak and never impacted the universe. Not like you. I let you live because you have some small importance. But know that I can end you at any moment.
2: Yes...yes God.
God: Now. You must go to Earth. You must undo what you have done. You must put that whole solar system back where it belongs.
2: But how? The Black Hole is truly random, I don't even know where Earth will end up...
God: Figure it out yourself. Or I will kill you.
2: ...I'm so sorry. 1, I'm so sorry. Please...tell me you can bring him back.
God: No. I can't. And even if I could...I woulnd't. I am a cruel God. Never forget.
2: I won't...I won't...