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thing of the day (thing+671)

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
"It's all bullshit. We think we know...but we don't. No, really, we don't. I...let me explain. Like...we have things in our head. We...we all live in our own heads, right? Our own heads, our own brains, that's all we really know. We can look at other things, talk to other people, but ultimately we all experience the universe uniquely. In our own heads. We...we write our own reality. We tell stories to ourself to make sense of our lives. But it's all in us! Everything...everything is in us, not external...in us. There's no...no truth! It's all subjective. We made it all up. Like like like...the rules. There are no rules. People might tell us rules but we can choose to ignore them or modify them or follow them...but we might completely misunderstand them. Then we're living our whole lives with like a false impression of the rules but we don't even know! We think we have it right but we don't but who's to say the person who told you the rules even had them right, and the rules were all made up in someone's head anyway so what does it matter! Like...death. Remember when you first found out about death? You were scared. I know I was. I couldn't move. When I understood it that I was going to die. I didn't want to die! So I rationalised it, made it something that wouldn't really happen to me, it would happen in a future so far away that I'd be so completely changed that the me who was scared wouldn't be the same me who died so I didn't have to worry about it...there's only one me! I'm me, I'm trapped in this head, in this skull, rattling about..we write our own narrative but it's crap. Time passing doessn't matter. There's only this. Only this. Then you're confronted with the awful truth that the stuff you believe we just in your head, just something you made up...and we can't cope. We keep lying. Religion! No wonder people believe in religion! Easy answers to fill the gap. Don't worry about anything, there's a plan for you. Just keep living your life. Living and living and livig...and for what? FOR WHAT?"

Taylor Swift sat down after her speech. She was tired now. Madonna had listened to every word.

"Yeah, I'm going crazy in here too," said Madonna. She didn't know how long they'd been in the alien zoo. Rihanna's ship being destroyed seemed like years ago. Neither she nor Taylor aged anymore, so perhaps it had been years ago. Or maybe it had just been weeks. It was hard to say. Every day was the same. Aliens would come to look at them. They'd be fed. They'd sleep. Every day.

"This is what life is," said Taylor. "THIS."

"I know," said Madonna. "I'm right here with you."

"I wish we'd died on Earth," said Taylor.

"Don't say that," said Madonna. "As long as we're alive we know the Earth is safe. The robot can't get to us here. Maybe...maybe it's good that we're in the zoo. Maybe we're the sacrifice the world needs."

"Do you think me fans miss me?" asked Taylor. "I loved them, Madonna, I really did. People said I just pretended to love them, to look good...but I really did love them. I spent hours on tumblr...hours..." She began to cry.

"I'm sure they miss you," said Madonna.

"I bet Katy Perry's tried to steal them," said Taylor.

"Oh come on," said Madonna. "Why the fuck would anyone ever like her?" They both laughed. Soon the aliens came to stare at them. Taylor flashed her tits at them. They ran off in fear. Madonna smiled. It was good to see Taylor still fighting.

Then the alien came to feed them. It made them stand behind a line. If they tried to cross it they'd be shocked. They'd both tried, days, weeks or months ago, and it had not been pleasant. This time the keeper was fatter than normal. It looked strange. Unsteady on its feet.

"What's wrong with you?" Taylor asked as the alien just stared at them. Suddenly it was ripped open, from the inside. Rihanna stood in the now opened skin of the alien holding her sword, covered in green blood.

"Nothing, bitches," she said. "I'm here to fucking rescue you!"
 
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