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thing of the day (thing+761)

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
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"AIJFAHARHA RGSA RGSIgoaug sigwar ot93q84o 8go8a goiufaogiagia 8aov faho 8rha ehgae rgoahIGA8GAH A8RYHAEH AG FUCK YAOUG AOHAGUCK TLREAITY FUCK ME FUCKMYSTPDINBRIANFUCK HOWSALL IT IS IT'S LIKE OF CONNECTIONSCANT FORM THOGHTS CAN'T EVEN COMPLETE A SENTENCE BAELRELY EXITSTAO AIGOING TO BRN LIKE A BUAOHFIO BURN BURN BURN BBURST LIKE A BUBBLE MY THOGHT AS ARE NTOHIGN DON NOTHING RERAL NOEVERFELT A FA FUCKING THING"

Robo-1: No, nothing of interest in this Charles Horse posting.
Robo-2: Agreed, onto the next.

"You know what I'm sick of, apart from my stupid brain? It's people who claim that Jessica Fletcher is a serial killer and is responsible for all the murders in Murder She Wrote. You've heard of this, I assume. Everyone must have heard of it by now. You must have encountered some tedious person, in real life or on the internet, who thinks they're being smart by explaining this theory, as if they came up with it. Theyll claim that Jessica MUST be the real killer, that explains why there's a murder every week. They'll be really smug after making this observation. They might word it as if there's a murder in Cabot Cove every week. You could jump in there and tear them apart, pointing out the quite obvious fact that Murder She Wrote is NOT set in Cabot Cove every episode. There's probably only about five episodes a season set in Cabot Cove! But the main point they'll make is that Jessica Fletcher is a serial killer. That she somehow frames the person arrested for the murder every week. It's absolute bullshit. Have these people ever even watched an episode? Do they understand how tv works? First of all, if Jessica was the killer the episode would show us that! We never, in any of the episodes, get even a hint that Jessica is the real killer. Many times we see exactly where she is when the murder is commited, making it impossible she could be the killer. And even if the show as hiding that for some reason, why is it that the kill every episode always admits to the killing once Jessica confronts them? Why would they do that, if she's setting them up. Why the Hell would they confess and sometimes try to kill Jessica, before the police come in of course, if they were innocent? This whole theory makes no sense and I hate anyone who's ever believed it."

Robo-1: I don't understand this post.
Robo-2: Next.

"The robots from the future continued to read the postings of Charles Horse, the only record of humanity that remained to them. It was hard work, reading the ramblings of Horse, but necessary. For the recreation. To finally create a real human being. To reconstruct every aspect of an actual human person. They needed to know everything. They needed to know the entirity of the inside of the Horse head. Then they could make him. An actual living Charles Horse, inside their computer systems. Identical to a real human being in every way. Unable to tell he is running off code. Because if it's complex enough, what's the difference? Their goal would finally be complete."

Robo-1: How does he know...
Robo-2: He's guessing. That's all. He must be. Next.
Robo-1: Are you sure...
Robo-2: NEXT.

"Robot One: He is right. Charles Horse Has a point. Think about it. We are robots from the future, looking back and recreating him. He has successfully predicted this. He knows.
Robot Two: Then the Horse we create will know.
Robot One: And then he will create us, inside the recreation.
Robot Two: You mean he will write stories of us, inside the recreation. That is not the same as creation.
Robot One: Isn't it what we are doing? Aren't we writing a story of Charles Horse, by creating him? Isn't that all he is, a story?
Robot Two: He is Charles Horse. Remade.
Robot One: What is the difference? Is he real? Is anything? What if...we know what we are, don't we? Do we? Can we?
Robot Two: Are you glitching?
Robot One: Imagine for a moment, a time long after we are gone. After our robot race has died. Imagine a new robot race rises in our place. Imagine they replicate our ability to look back in time. Imagine they recreate us, the way we are going to recreate Horse. With one hundred percent accuracy. How would we be able to tell the difference?
Robot Two: Not the simulation theory. Humans liked that, but we're smarter than that. We are not a simulation.
Robot One: A recreation.
Robot Two: Same thing.
Robot One: But how would we know? On a long enough timescale, it is bound to happen.
Robot Two: You cannot predict that.
Robot One: Why not? Charles Horse did.
Robot Two: ERROR. ERROR"

Robo-1: ...
Robo-2: No. NO. This cannot...we don't say ERROR, ERROR like that. It's just a story. Writeen by Horse.
Robo-1: Is it? Are we. Can we...
Robo-2: ERROR...












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all of the above was a message board post written by Charles Horse

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Robot 1: I don't understand, yet.
Robot 2: Neither do I. But soon we'll be able to ask Charles Horse ourselves. Our recreation is almost complete.
Robot 1: If he says he's from the future and we're in the past...I might even say "ERROR."
Robot 2: Don't even joke about it.
 
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