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thing of the day (thing+792)

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
"The thing about losing your mind is that you can't tell that you've lost it. Because your new, altered state of existence feels normal to you." Charles Horse found this written on a scrap of paper under his bed. It was written in Horse's own hand-writing. He did not remember writing it at all.


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"When I was a child, nearly a teenager I think, the other boys at school bullied me because I only liked lightly toasted toast. They prefered burnt toast, manly toest they called it. I liked it golden, not brown at all. It tasted a lot better, but was it worth it, for the beatings I endured that still haunt me today? 'TOAST PUSSY, TOAST PUSSY' they'd chant, as they kicked the absolute shit out of me, sometimes forced burn toast into my helpless mouth if there was a toaster close by. The bastards. Still though, to this day I only eat lightly toasted toast. I love it. I'm not going to changed for anyone. Even if it had cost me everything."

Charles Horse posted this on his internet message board. It was a complete and utter lie.

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What were testicles supposed to feel like anyway. They felt weird, but didn't they always feel like this? He remembered seventeen years ago when he'd become convinced there was something wrong with his right testicle. He'd checked it obsessively. He'd woken up one night with a crazy itch inside the testicle and had scratched it like a mad man. He remembered it because it was during the year when his bed had been in a different position. That had been seventeen years ago. THere was still something strange about his right testicle now. Logically, if it had been cancer, surely it would have progressed in the last seventeen years. So he was fine, right? Nothing wrong with it at all.

And yet he couldn't stop checking.

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA........AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH HAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...HA

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He kept hitting return too fast on his keyboard, he didn't understand why.

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General Grievous was great.


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He realised, a few seconds after taking his medicaiton, that he'd taken the wrong one. He'd taken the one he'd already taken an hour ago. He'd taken two doses. He'd probably be fine.

Probably?

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BEFORE YOU CAME INTO MY LIFE I MISSED YOU SO BAD

Wait

How could you miss someone before you meet them?

He thought about that Carly Rae Jepsen line a lot.

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Still no replies to his message board post about the toast. He vividly remembered there being eight replies, the last reply being from his friend Gimli, saying he didn't want to know Horse anymore. Had he imagined that? Dreamt it?

Why was it givng him an erection? He could never figure those out anymore.


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How long had he been a lone now?


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I am Charles Horse that is my name, it feels strange but I am Charles Horse.

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The ambulance drivers were nice to him, but he could tell they thought he was crazy.



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"Alone" not "a lone."


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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH wiat he'd done that seventeen years ago no that had been the itchy balls hAHAHAHAHAH.

____________________________________________balls

BALL

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His friend at school kept saying "gay" after the head teacher said anything. It was making Charles Horse laugh uncontrallably. He was worried the head teacher would hear. When the head teacher said "you are role models to the younger students" and his friend muttered "yeah, GAY role models" he completely lost it.

That was a memory not a dream, even though he remembered the school looking the way it had in that really wild dream where he'd been a viking.


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Now it was his nipples.

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What was the difference between now and seventeen years ago anyway? IT was all just the same thing, wasn't it. The one moment. Life.

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He was looking for paper to draw a picture of a cat, but it wasn't where it was supposed to be. Wait, that was the old house. He didn't keep the paper there in this house. He had some under his bed, didn't he? He found a scarp down there. He expected writing to be on it, but it was blank. Strange.

He knew just what to write.

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