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If you're going to be there too, please refrain from yelling out various tidbits of carnal knowledge re: me; as my mother might be there too and you wouldn't know it.
She gave me a paper lunch bag full of condoms in 6th grade to "give out to any friends or classmates you know who might need them or OH GOD if you need them"
She'd wake me up in the middle of the night; I'd hear her calling my name from her bed. She'd be really sleepy and out of it, and ask me if the windows were open. If they were, I needed to shut them. If they weren't, I needed to open them, and then she'd wake up a few hours later and have me shut them.
I didn't. Looking back, I realize now that either I suffered from chronic insomnia or I just didn't need much sleep. I didn't really notice at the time, my closet had a light bulb so I'd sit in there and read.