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ULTIMATE housemate rankings

CaptainWacky

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
1) Victor - He's STILL the Slickman, rapper/part-time hitman. Probably my all-time favourite housemate and he's just as funny as ever.
2) Nikki - It's Nikki Fucking Grahame, do I have to explain?
3) Brian - I don't think I liked him first time around, but he is actually really funny and witty.
4) Michelle - She's being really amusing with Victor at the moment. Much smarter than I remember her being in BB5.
5) Chantelle - I think she's a genuine nice, funny, naive, innocent girl who had a BB romance...basically she's everything Josie's supposed to be.
6) Coolio - He's as annoying as fuck, but that's what makes him good tv.
7) Makosi - She comes out with some great random stuff like "Paul McKenna is the second coming."
8) Nick - He doesn't do much but he's okay.
9) Nadia - I forgot how horrible that laugh was.
10) Preston - He wouldn't be in there without Chantelle.
11) Ulrika - Why the fuck did they waste a place on her?
 
dunrkl rankihngs (i'll post normal wones tomorrow)

1) Chantelle. she's so genuine and sweet. when i heard she was going in i rolled my eyes, but she's so nice and honest and she still loves preston. awww. :( Does say "janaaaaaaahmean?!" too often though.
2) Brian. I love brian, he's so funny and quick witted. I reckon he's after a talk show or something, but he deserves it realy. His questioning of Preston was really insightful and he'd actually make a great host. Kill Alan Carr and replace with Brian Dowling ples.
3) Ummmmmmmmmmmmmm *looks at Wacky's eankings). Oh shit.
NIKKI - I'd forgotten she was tgere. Sh's tyiical Nikki. Really funny and adorable but not making much impact SO FAR. Might come to blows with Coolio?
4) Makosi - fucking weird. fake as well, but entertaining. I love how EVERYTHING she says is in that deadpan delivery. Can't tell what's real and what's not. Must be welll frustrating to live with, but entertaining oh i said that :)
5) I dunno... Preston? - tries too hard to be Morrisey. Has really weird cross eyed thing going on. Nice enough.
6) Coolio 0- hilarious but sometimes i think he might be serious with all that perv stuff. will defo rape chantelle before end of series.
7) Nadia - talks like a fuckin retarded spacko goat or somethin but otherwise seems ok. Better han i expected.
8) Ulrka - As muh as i dislike her at last she SPEAKLS
9) Nick - booooooooooooooring. but it's not his fault. he's just a normal person. i 'd be thesame.

10) - Michelle - like her marginally more as she didn't inexplicably do the eastenders "doof doof doof" thing when she went in like Victor did.
11) - Victor - je's Victor!!!
Victor
 
SOBER, LEVEL-HEADED RANKINGS


1) Brian - Swapped him around with Chantelle. He's absolutely hilarious and he can come out with what should be really cutting remarks in a kind of cheeky, non-offensive way. His line about Nikki's tantrums was fantastic.
2) Chantelle - Still really nice and everything, janaaaahmean? Also a lot nicer looking and intelligent than I gave her credit for. There's a possibility that she could get boring after a while and we might get tired of the pining over Preston (I think it's pining, don't you?), but so far I find it fascinating.
3) Nikki - I was in as many tears as her during the typewriter incident. Too funny for words. Could we get tired of her tantrums? I dunno. She's cried a hell of a lot and it's not been going on that long.
4) Makosi - Total hypocrite, showering in the garden in front of everyone, then complaining that people are obsessed with her boobs. The big titted women always act like that. Anyway, because of all that stuff she's interesting to watch. Very unpredictable.
5) Preston - He's nice. Doesn't really do much or say anything remotely memorable. Wouldn't be worth having in there if it weren't for his ex.
6) Nick - He is boring, but at least he's not annoying. Hopefully he'll come out of his shell eventually, though I suspect he may not be in a shell at all and he really is this uninteresting.
7) Ulrka - I like it when she gets psychological and gives advice. Can come off a bit preachy, but hey, she's 90 years old. She has way more life experience than most of them. The crying during the clown thing was weird, but I'll give her the benefit of the doubt that it was really a bunch of other issues that were tipping her over the edge, not a man with a mask who pointed at people a bit.
8) Nadia - She has her moments, but she gets way too shouty and makes a huge palaver out of things that shouldn't be a big deal. And it's annoying hearing someone shout when you can't understand what they're saying.

9) Victor and Michelle - Not really fair to put them with the others since they've not done anything yet.
 
I hate how Nadia's basically forced Coolio out of the house just because the producers would rather have her than him.
 
I should do another one of these. NOW.

1) Victor - I think the best thing about his return is that he's showing that he actually is just a nice, funny guys who's easy to live with. I'm glad he hasn't gone full on evil (not that he ever was last time) and has kept it tongue in cheek. BUT THEY SHOULD SHOW BBLBC ON THE HIGHLIGHTS.
2) Nikki - She's a human entertainment machine.
3) Brian - The banging his foot and puking moment was classic (ruined a bit by Davina's over the top praise but that's not his fault.)
4) Nick - He's really smart and funny but he's getting a raw deal on the highlights.
5) Chantelle - She's nice.
6) Michelle - She's not exactly an ultimate housemate without someone to stalk.
7) Preston - He's a nice enough chap but he adds nothing.
8) Ulrika - WHY IS SHE STILL IN THERE.
9) Vanessa - She sure ain't Aisleyne.
 
1) Brian - He's the most consistently funny and entertaining. If he's onscreen, you pretty much know you're going to enjoy whatever happens next.
2) Nikki - Adorable, irascible, irreplaceable. I cannot believe there are people out there who don't like her.
3) Victor - I reckon he's the smartest housemate. He sees everything and probably could engineer a win if he really put his mind to it. Really funny and charming, not how I remembered him at all (I didn't watch that BB a lot).
4) Chantelle - Taken a bit of a backseat the last few days, at least in their editing. The interest in the renewed relationship may be waning now it's becoming clear that Preston just sees her as a good mate. But still really genuine and nice and always manages to speak her mind and contribute while keeping her cool and remaining dignified, janaaaaahmean?
5) Nick - I suppose. I still don't find him that interesting, even though I can see he's funny at times. Needs to get more involved.
6) Michelle - So far the only things on her "best bits" will be her crying in the bedsit and singing at the eviction. Needs to do more! Nice though.
7) Preston - Before I forget him. He's nice enough, but he doesn't do anything. Best moments so far were him looking like a 12 year old (it was the cap that did it) and various Chantelley bits.
8) Vanessa - Got potential at least.
9) Ulrika - I sympathised with her over the thing with Nadia, but WHY does she have to be so judgemental and so obvious about it?! She's always giving people advice on how they should behave, but she's completely unselfaware.
 
Victor was always charming and well liked by his fellow housemates in BB5. He managed to avoid nominations for quite a while. It just so happened that he had several huge arguments that are hard to forget.
 
1) Victor - He's probably my all time favourite housemate. He undestands Big Brother completely but he's still "being himself". No bullshit, just naturally entertaining and likable AND HE SHOULD WIN.
2) Nikki - I do think the crying in the Diary Room was a bit much and that she's POSSIBLY trying to milk her illness now that we're near the end to get more votes. But she's still Nikki!
3) Nick - He's a genuinely interesting and eccentric guy without being an obnoxious camera-hogging idiot. It's a shameBB have moved away from this type of housemate in recent years.
4) Brian - He's amusing.
5) Chantelle - She is nice but if she wins it's ONLY because of sympathy which isn't how I want the final BB to end.
6) Preston - He's an alright guy but one of the seven best housemates ever?
7) Ulrika - Why.
 
1) Brian - A bit self conscious, but still the funniest intentionally funny housemate ever.
2) Nikki - Funniest unintentionally (usually) funny housemate ever. And I've liked the recent insights into her anorexia. I don't think she's talked about it to gain sympathy, as she can't have expected BB to show so much of her conversations. The one the other day with Vanessa in the garden was the longest, most interesting conversation I can remember them showing.
3) Victor - VERY good value for money. Definitely 'gets' BB and how to play the game without coming off as a dick. I like that he has a working class accent, but is the most intelligent person in there. He's only #3 because Brian and Nikki were faves of mine before UBB.
4) Chantelle - Yeah, because I feel for her, but she's generally quite nice and gets involved.
5) Nick - I'm glad he's had this opportunity to show that he isn't really nasty and he can be very funny, but he always looks really ill at ease and I don't like watching that.
6) Preston - He's not Ulrika.
7) Ulrika - Ugggghhhh. BB arguably ended when she won CBB6. AND HERE SHE IS AGAIN, THE OLD GRIM FUCKING REAPER!!!
 
You NEARLY got the order they finished in correct (Victor really should have finished above Chantelle so that we had three housemates from regular BB in the top three.)
 
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