What if Jesus was fat?

[CaptainWacky]

Sure we always see Our Lord depicted as being in great shape with rocks hard abs BUT WHAT IF IN REALITY HE WAS A FATTY FAT FAT FAT, LIKE THE SIZE OF HURLEY FROM LOST OR LARGER!?

 

[jack]

I bet if he were a fatty he'd have a heart attack pushing the rock after being resurrected, and that would suck.

 

[CaptainWacky]

But he would be able to survive the cruciFICTION due to his extra body fat like Cartman in that one South Park if you remember.

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

Also it woulda took a lot more than 4 nails...

 

[johnford]

If Jesus was fat theres no way the cross would stay up without collapsing underneath his gerth.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Unless God's Will kept him up.

 

[Todd Quinlan]

Then God and I have something in common. A rigid will!

*Five*

 

[CaptainWacky]

Admiral Will?

 

[Berronman]

Jesus, does nobody around here watch "Scrubs"? Ever?

Todd is a themed character dual.

 

[jack]

I'm sorry, I only watch splatter films on my tv

 

[Kerb Crawler]

Evidence presented for your consideration:

^Elvis Christ

^Bloated by His own Message and Excess

^Jesus would be MUCH more popular if he had impersonators who performed at weddings, parties and TEH VEGAS STRIP!

 

[jack]

Jesus has a camel toe.

 

[Mandi]

This is just beggin for a Denis Leary skit!

 

[johnford]

Jesus christ that was elvis before he died!