CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
I'LL EXPLORE THAT SUBJECT IN THIS PLAY:
(Castek is walking down the street when he bumps into Charlotte Church's massive tits.)
Church: Eh, whach where you're going, 'ere!
Castek: Frightfully sorry...hang on, aren't you an impessively bosomed welshwoman of some renown?
Church: 'ere, what's it to you lad?
Castek: Well, as a matter of fact, my friend CaptainWacky has long desired to rape one of your kind.
Church: Well ya can tell this Captain Winky or whatever his STINKIN' MINGIN' name is that he's not raping me, ya perve!
Castek: Tell him yourself, trollop.
(Castek stabs Church in the neck with a hidden knife.)
Church: ...ugh.
Castek: Don't worry, you're quite unharmed. I've temorarily paralysed you by stabbing you in the chrastotic nerve with expert precision. Panic not. You will not cease to live. Yet.
(Castek drags her off the street into a van.)
Castek: Well Wacky, I did as you asked. I trust this repays our debt in full?
(Wacky looks up from his laptop where he's posting a reply to the "Harkley likes spunk" thread on the MF.)
Wacky: Yes, we are square now, as they say. You may go.
Castek: A pleasure, as always.
(Castek departs.)
Wacky: Now my dear...we really must do something about those breasts...
(Wacky takes a saw out of his pants and advances on a terrified Church.)
Church: No...NOOOOO!
(Castek bounds back into the van and punches a shocked Wacky in the nose!
Castek: A thousand apologies, but I cannot allow this to continue. To do something as obscene as saw off her breasts is not the kind of thing I'll sit back and watch!
Church: Thank...thank you...
Castek:...not when I could TITTY-FUCK her all day long!
Church: NOOOOOOOOOOO!
FIN
(Castek is walking down the street when he bumps into Charlotte Church's massive tits.)
Church: Eh, whach where you're going, 'ere!
Castek: Frightfully sorry...hang on, aren't you an impessively bosomed welshwoman of some renown?
Church: 'ere, what's it to you lad?
Castek: Well, as a matter of fact, my friend CaptainWacky has long desired to rape one of your kind.
Church: Well ya can tell this Captain Winky or whatever his STINKIN' MINGIN' name is that he's not raping me, ya perve!
Castek: Tell him yourself, trollop.
(Castek stabs Church in the neck with a hidden knife.)
Church: ...ugh.
Castek: Don't worry, you're quite unharmed. I've temorarily paralysed you by stabbing you in the chrastotic nerve with expert precision. Panic not. You will not cease to live. Yet.
(Castek drags her off the street into a van.)
Castek: Well Wacky, I did as you asked. I trust this repays our debt in full?
(Wacky looks up from his laptop where he's posting a reply to the "Harkley likes spunk" thread on the MF.)
Wacky: Yes, we are square now, as they say. You may go.
Castek: A pleasure, as always.
(Castek departs.)
Wacky: Now my dear...we really must do something about those breasts...
(Wacky takes a saw out of his pants and advances on a terrified Church.)
Church: No...NOOOOO!
(Castek bounds back into the van and punches a shocked Wacky in the nose!
Castek: A thousand apologies, but I cannot allow this to continue. To do something as obscene as saw off her breasts is not the kind of thing I'll sit back and watch!
Church: Thank...thank you...
Castek:...not when I could TITTY-FUCK her all day long!
Church: NOOOOOOOOOOO!
FIN
