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How to be a good wife

Conchaga said:
Except for Nancy Sinatra's "Bang Bang"

I thought that was Sonny and Cher.

Excellent cover of that by Paul Weller, btw. You can probably find it floating around the internet.
 
Number_6 said:
I thought that was Sonny and Cher.

Excellent cover of that by Paul Weller, btw. You can probably find it floating around the internet.

Well Sonny & Cher did a version too. I don't recall any others.
 
It was Sonny and Cher. Cher did a remake years later. I'd be playing it now, as a matter of fact, but, you know, with my computer being a piece of shite and all...

Feminism. Something I'm really struggling with right now. The Gloria Steinem indoctinated part of me wants to go off on all your asses about freedom, and independence, and not choosing a life of servitude. I'm mean, I'm chomping at the bit here.

However...

I'm forcing myself to view things from a different perspective. Being a mother is a fulfilling role. I've seen firsthand the difficulties being a working mother brings. Women are torn between work and children, and neither side gets full attention.

The putting your man first part I'm going to reserve judgment for, for awhile. That one's just too hard for me right now.
 
It's about respect. If your husband respects the job you do, keeping his home clean, his meals made, his children well mannered and educated then it's a very fulfilling job. If your husband takes the things you do to run a smooth household for granted then I can imagine it'd be a job that no woman wanted.

My sincerest wish is that I am able to marry a man that makes enough money to support our household and I don't have to work outside of it. I'll do without a lot to make that happen and if he can provide me that I will, in turn, provide him with a home, children and a wife he can be proud of. I truly believe that being a wife and a mother is the most important career a woman could choose.
 
Now that my new Mac guru Ishkabittle has given me my baby back, I'm listening to Cher's version as I type this. :D

But Clay needs to be next. 'Cause, you know...he's Clay. :bigass:
 
Oh and on the subject of "servitude"; whether you're at home or in an office, you're always serving someone it's just a matter of who you choose to serve. And if you think owning your own business is the key, think again, you'll be serving your customers.

I personally would rather serve my husband than some blow-hard making money off my blood sweat and tears or the ungrateful legion of customers and their demands.

There just a whole lot of ass kissing involved and at least I know where my husband's ass has been.
 
Friday said:
The putting your man first part I'm going to reserve judgment for, for awhile. That one's just too hard for me right now.

Any why wouldn't a wife put her husband first? He's probably putting her [and his children first].

What feminism and freedom gave us was the ability to choose our husbands with greater care. No longer do women choose to get married because they need someone to take care of them, and so fewer women have to choose men who don't actually love them. That's the benefit of Feminism.

Where we [as women] go afoul, is that we forgot how to be women to our husbands, instead we are confusing 'choice' with some kind of eternal battle with men. They are men, we are women.. there's no battle. We just need to remember how to act like women and not angry bitches.

If we don't remember, we can't expect men to act like men now can we? Who wants to put up with an angry bitch all the time?
 
Sonny wrote it. Nancy Sinatra sings the version that plays at the beginning of Kill Bill vol 1.
 
Caitriona said:
Any why wouldn't a wife put her husband first? He's probably putting her [and his children first].

What feminism and freedom gave us was the ability to choose our husbands with greater care. No longer do women choose to get married because they need someone to take care of them, and so fewer women have to choose men who don't actually love them. That's the benefit of Feminism.

Where we [as women] go afoul, is that we forgot how to be women to our husbands, instead we are confusing 'choice' with some kind of eternal battle with men. They are men, we are women.. there's no battle. We just need to remember how to act like women and not angry bitches.

If we don't remember, we can't expect men to act like men now can we? Who wants to put up with an angry bitch all the time?

She shoots, she scores, or GOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!

Exactly. How can I respect you if you're a bitch all the time simply because you have the freedom to be a bitch???

BTW, your avatar is very callypygous!
 
Big Dick McGee said:
Exactly. How can I respect you if you're a bitch all the time simply because you have the freedom to be a bitch???

Exactly. Why if I had to put up with half of the crap I hear women go on and on about, I'd put ear plugs in and say to myself "Fuck the bitch".

I'm not saying men don't have their short comings, but it's NOT ALL their fault. Just because women are free, doesn't mean they can sucker punch a guy [endless bitching] all the time, and then expect him to make mad passionate love, make a decent living and give in to all the endless demands women seem to have. It's just not gonna happen.. and any woman who thinks so is an idiot and gives us all a bad name.

BTW, your avatar is very callypygous!

:bigass:
 
I think that the real issue of feminism is that it removes the concept of "role" in gender relationships. It also ignores responsibility TO another, arguably it pre-dates the "greed is good" attitude of the 80's, but it also embodies it to a degree.

A Husband has a role, traditionally defined as the out of house "bread winner", with the Wife as support and home-maker. It works well IF both sides are willing to work together, and both in role. My household is essentially single-income, and I expect the fact that I provide financially to be respected and honored. Similarly, I must honor and respect what she does, and the fact that she makes concessions too. If either side disregards role, then where is the structure to work together?
BTW, I do dishes, I also help clean when it's necessary. I expect, however, that she will be more "fresh" at the end of the day than I am, and essentially she puts in more hours than I do at a lower intensity. That's not bad, that's not harder, and that's not easier either. That's a role she can choose to take, and one I honor by taking on my role.

I'm not sure if that is a well put together commentary, cait is much more eloquent on this matter than I. "Housewife" is not a demening position, even if today's society makes it so. pix often worries if she is between dancing or teaching jobs that everyone will think she's lazy (she is not). Of course, her friends are also usually envious too...

-SB
 
I know both super-driven, career-first women, and stay-at-home Mom types. No shit, most, if not all, of the career women are uber-bitches, because they still feel like they have something to prove to the world.

Without exception, the stay-at-home Moms seem much, much happier, and more content.

Just my observation, but I think it speaks to a larger truth.
 
That's my point exactly SB.

I'm not going to mow the lawn and I don't expect you to do the laundry. It certainly isn't that I can't mow the lawn, I can and I expect that my husband can do laundry too but no matter how dirty laundry can get it's not the filthy lawn and therefore I am happy to accept my role as lady of the laundry room.
 
Exactly SB & L_G.

It's a question of recognizing how to best work together. TOGETHER being the operative word. Partnerships work best if each person works in such a way as to compliment the other.

I believe marriages fail oftentimes because both partners are functioning in the "same role" when they need to be functioning in complimentary ones. You have two bread winners [which I agree is necessary more often than not], those roles are all well and good, but who does the complimentary "home" jobs?

SB is right, one is not more important than the other, they function as twp parts of a whole. Each needed to complete the partnership.

In legal terms, partnerships involve a set of duties and responsibilities for each partner. They are usually spelled out in the contract in great detail. They are also usually, differing roles, but cooperative ones. One does this, the other does that. It's a successful model to look at when it comes to marriage contracts. [which unfortunately are not spelled out] I'll bet there are more successful business partnerships than marriages for this reason--each know what role they need to play in order to make the partnership successful.

As I said, women may have needed their freedom only to be able to make the decision freely and willingly to be in one of the complimentary roles. Otherwise it might be best to live alone and not even try to make a partnership work.

Maybe the next step in human development will be to really explore the way partnerships work, so people can stop being centered in their individuality and can choose to contribute to the marriage in effective and complimentary ways.

Well,........... a girl can always hope. ;)
 
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