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I hope when you die you get statisitcs

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
Like "PERCENTAGE OF YOUR LIFE WASTED: 99.97%" and "NUMBER OF WANKS: NINE MILLION"
 
hmmm...nine million wanks...?
not bad.
 
PERCENTAGE OF TIME WASTED THINKING ABOUT WILLIAM SHATNER: 37.2%
 
Nine million is probably a bit much.
 
oh.
 
Wacky, don't be a glum goose. I'd be sad if u died before me. Ok then?
 
It would be cool to get statistics when you die.
 
i WANNA know how many oreos i've eaten.
 
I won't exist so I won't care.
 
well I'm a little disappointed that the nine million wanks was justa cruel hoax.
 
Wanking Statistics: If you wank 9 million times in say 30 years, your Wank Rate (WR) is 822 per day. This could very well cause permanent damage to the hand and wanking wrist. Play safe.
 
822 wanks per day (wpd) is approx. 1.75 wanks per minute (wpm). So you would have to come roughly once every 52.25 seconds to meet your quota.

LOL @ "COME ROUGHLY" LOL THAT'S EVERY TIME, BABY YEAH!
 
AND you'd have to have some really good lube or the skin of your wanker might cum off
 
At that wpd & wpm rate, it would be worth it to just tie a pail to your wankee.
 
It FEELS like nine million.
 
I must agree with Cassie concerning the Friction Factor (FF).
 
Do NOT SET YOURSELF ON FIRE!
 
But I want to.
 
Time spent on TK: 48%
Time spent thinking about William Shatner: 53%
Time spent studying math: 0%
Cause of death: Chronic masterbation.
 
Most wanked over person of all time: yourself in a mirror.
 
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