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NEVER FORGET: Data's Ode to Spot

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
Felis catus is your taxonomic nomenclature,
An endothermic quadruped, carnivorous by nature;
Your visual, olfactory, and auditory senses
Contribute to your hunting skills and natural defenses.

I find myself intrigued by your subvocal oscillations,
A singular development of cat communications
That obviates your basic hedonistic predilection
For a rhythmic stroking of your fur to demonstrate affection.

A tail is quite essential for your acrobatic talents;
You would not be so agile if you lacked its counterbalance.
And when not being utilized to aid in locomotion,
It often serves to illustrate the state of your emotion.

O Spot, the complex levels of behavior you display
Connote a fairly well-developed cognitive array.
And though you are not sentient, Spot, and do not comprehend,
I nonetheless consider you a true and valued friend.
 
That poem was actually the product of 4 century's worth of mistranslation of the lyrics to Prince's "Pussy Control."
 
*CLAPS*


Commander, you have anticipated my denouement.
 
Still not too late for a USS Titan series with Riker.
 
yearly bump
 
Frakes looks like Sir Richard Attenborough now. It's too late.

But he could be Cranky Admiral Riker who always bugs the captain of a new, sexy crew in the 24th century (almost the turn of the 25th actually)
 
Riker plans on living forever.
 
Unlike their ships. Well they do tend to live to about 120-130 in the future, so why not.

Did I mention the new sexy crew should be comprised entirely of BISEXUALS?
 
Everyone should be bisexiaul in the future. Aggressively so.
 
THIS IS THE TRUE MISSION OF ONE DIRECTION.

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That just turned me straight sorry.
 
Yearly bump.
 
The mission of the new Enterprise-F: TO BOLDY GO IN ONE DIRECTION...OUT THERE!
 
Taylor Swift is our leader now. She will shake off the universe.
 
1D throws up on us ALL!

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I know he was vomitting when he walked in (I don't know.)
 
Spot bump.
 
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