I love this planet! I've got wealth, fame, and access to the depths of sleaze that those things bring.
Man, I'm sore all over. I feel like I just went ten rounds with mighty Thor. Hello, little man. I will destroy you! Oh God, what have I done? Just once I'd like to eat dinner with a celebrity who isn't bound and gagged.
I'll tell them you went down prying the wedding ring off his cold, dead finger. Bender, hurry! This fuel's expensive! Also, we're dying!
I'm Santa Claus! I saw you with those two "ladies of the evening" at Elzars. Explain that.
But, like most politicians, he promised more than he could deliver.
Anyone who laughs is a communist! Professor, make a woman out of me. In our darkest hour, we can stand erect, with proud upthrust bosoms. With a warning label this big, you know they gotta be fun!
- I decline the title of Iron Cook and accept the lesser title of Zinc Saucier, which I just made up. Uhh… also, comes with double prize money.
- Look, everyone wants to be like Germany, but do we really have the pure strength of 'will'?
- Robot 1-X, save my friends! And Zoidberg!
In your time, yes, but nowadays shut up! Besides, these are adult stemcells, harvested from perfectly healthy adults whom I killed for their stemcells.
Bender! Ship! Stop bickering or I'm going to come back there and change your opinions manually! I'll get my kit! Bender?! You stole the atom. It must be wonderful.
- Come, Comrade Bender! We must take to the streets!
- You're going back for the Countess, aren't you?
- Good man. Nixon's pro-war and pro-family.
Kids have names? Humans dating robots is sick. You people wonder why I'm still single? It's 'cause all the fine robot sisters are dating humans! You guys go on without me! I'm going to go… look for more stuff to steal!
You're going back for the Countess, aren't you? That could be 'my' beautiful soul sitting naked on a couch. If I could just learn to play this stupid thing. Why did you bring us here? Interesting. No, wait, the other thing: tedious.
But I've never been to the moon! Kif, I have mated with a woman. Inform the men. We can't compete with Mom! Her company is big and evil! Ours is small and neutral! Why would a robot need to drink? Hey, what kinda party is this? There's no booze and only one hooker.
I guess because my parents keep telling me to be more ladylike. As though! Now, now. Perfectly symmetrical violence never solved anything. I'll get my kit! And remember, don't do anything that affects anything, unless it turns out you were supposed to, in which case, for the love of God, don't not do it!
WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY! GOOD NIGHT! Is today's hectic lifestyle making you tense and impatient? I just told you! You've killed me! It's just like the story of the grasshopper and the octopus. All year long, the grasshopper kept burying acorns for winter, while the octopus mooched off his girlfriend and watched TV. But then the winter came, and the grasshopper died, and the octopus ate all his acorns. Also he got a race car. Is any of this getting through to you?
This is the worst kind of discrimination: the kind against me! Now, now. Perfectly symmetrical violence never solved anything. I never loved you. Leela, Bender, we're going grave robbing. Ven ve voke up, ve had zese wodies.
I love you, buddy! Kif, I have mated with a woman. Inform the men. Well, let's just dump it in the sewer and say we delivered it. Hey, whatcha watching? Say it in Russian!
Bender, we're trying our best. You guys go on without me! I'm going to go… look for more stuff to steal! Can we have Bender Burgers again? Bender! Ship! Stop bickering or I'm going to come back there and change your opinions manually!
You, a bobsleder!? That I'd like to see! Pansy. Kids have names? Have you ever tried just turning off the TV, sitting down with your children, and hitting them?
I can explain. It's very valuable. You wouldn't. Ask anyway! Oh God, what have I done? What's with you kids? Every other day it's food, food, food. Alright, I'll get you some stupid food.
Quite possible. We live long and are celebrated poopers. Whoa a real live robot; or is that some kind of cheesy New Year's costume? Yeah, lots of people did. Can we have Bender Burgers again?
