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Shouldn't we be in church?

Ishcabittle

Ishcabittle

New member
Shame on us.

There are so many more productive things we could be doing right now. Like, being in church for instance. Don't consider it time spent at church, consider it an investment in the bank account of the afterlife.
 
OHHELLSNO.gif


I LIKE BEING UNPRODUCTIVE, AND CONTRIBUTING NOTHING TO SOCIETY.
 
Apparently (and this is just what I've heard) going to church get's you some sort of special room in heaven, overlooking the pool/nude beach.

You can be a bastard, a killer, a whore, or a thief, but go to church and that special room (with room service!) is yours.
 
Surely God isn't gullible enough to fall for the: rape, pillage, kill, maim, torture, steal, cheat, molest, lie then quickly repent in the last twenty seconds schtick?


And if he is I am sure I can beat him at chess or something (or was that William Sadler?) and blag a way into heaven if I'm wrong and it all does exists and I was still a good sort who just didn't wear a day-glo head band and play acoustic guitar every sunday?
 
Now this is just what I've heard, but yeah. Last minute redemption (with a priest present) works.

Take note, guy who stands on my street corner, eyeing my dog's haunches.
 
When I get ready to kick the bucket, I'm going to make sure my second in command has a couple of proton torpedoes to fire on my transporter signal, then beam up at the last second.

OWNED, GOD! OWNED!
 
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