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Song I wrote about Helene

Cassie said:
My electricity exploded! My internet caught on fire! Seriously. It looked like the sun when the wires burned at the end of the road. Don't know when it will be fixed . Fuck I am standing in an ant bed. Love you all!!!!
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Thinking of you homeslice...
 
What would I do with no internet? How would I wank? I mean there are some very old Mayfair's from the 80s in my attic, but I don't really know where they are. That's some scary shit.
 
whisky said:
What would I do with no internet? How would I wank? I mean there are some very old Mayfair's from the 80s in my attic, but I don't really know where they are. That's some scary shit.
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Asking the important cutting edge questions.
 
whisky said:
What would I do with no internet? How would I wank? I mean there are some very old Mayfair's from the 80s in my attic, but I don't really know where they are. That's some scary shit.
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I've got a couple old Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issues and an FHM magazine featuring Alyson Hannigan I can use for Internet outage wank emergencies.
 
Cassie said:
My electricity exploded! My internet caught on fire! Seriously. It looked like the sun when the wires burned at the end of the road. Don't know when it will be fixed . Fuck I am standing in an ant bed. Love you all!!!!
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You probably should not stand in an ant bed!
 
Cassie said:
My electricity exploded! My internet caught on fire! Seriously. It looked like the sun when the wires burned at the end of the road. Don't know when it will be fixed . Fuck I am standing in an ant bed. Love you all!!!!
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But will you make THE REUNION?!?!?!?
 
Did Bertha secretly cause the explosion?
 
Why are not politicians running on a "BAN THE HURRICANES" policy?
 
Still like him more than RISHI/KEIR/THATCHER (delete as appropriate.)
 
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Don't forget Theresa May!
 
What I want to know though is did he get his name Hurricane Pete because of his diet of just Brussle Sprouts?
 
CASSIE WHEN IS YOUR NEW INTERNET ARRIVING?
 
Tuesday?
 
No, it needs to arrive BY TOMORROW...
 
Oh, well... um...
 
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