Troll Kingdom
This is a sample guest message. Register a free account today to become a member! Once signed in, you'll be able to participate on this site by adding your own topics and posts, as well as connect with other members through your own private inbox!
The best part of Comicon...
- Thread starter Dark Pickle
- Start date
Dark Pickle
Fucked Off
Proof positive that even Commie Asshats are smarter than Mugen Morons.
Sad but troo!
Sad but troo!
The Dork Lord
Whipping Boy
Way of the world...
Dark Pickle
Fucked Off
CHAPTER THREE
Weemie Sucks Cock
"Nebraska sounds boring."
"It beats Louisiana to a pulp."
"Touché, mon ami, Cheech & Chong, whose name means 'he who devours your entrails and thoroughly enjoys it'."
"The End (possibly)."
"What the hell?"
"That's it exactly."
When you wish for revenge, you look wonderful tonight as you eat hot bakeapple pie cooked the way Ed's Grandmother used to before the accident, in which several metric tonnes of french vanilla, as per usual. 50 second orgasms were scientifically recorded in greasy detail amid post-funk-adelic stress patterns created by Moby. The great whale mated with Roseanne who insisted that she get everything coming to her.
"Wow, page 33."
"How about that."
"Take good care of our baby available at http://www.comicon.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=6;t=007243"
"He looks retarded."
TARDS R US in conjunction with Yanni cover bands proudly present Turd Gauthier and his Amazing Pocket Prod Experience! Live at the limits of $18.95, Grandma's retirement fund! FREE LIVE SUICIDE! You go first to sign Brittany's plaster cast. Then spell "Britney" correctly.
"B... R... I... tit knee. Right?"
"Brittany in France?"
"Overrated cum dumpster."
"Brittany" is correct. So is "bimbo."
Spears' mom disagrees. "E-mail my heart "
Wrong for Britney. Right for Brittany.
In the zone, Weemie takes one in the nutsack. Allah be praised! Death to Infidels! Jihad or bust a move on.org or orgnot, that is the way of gnomes.
"Um... uhhhhh, I...umm...”
“Knock. Knock."
"Who's there, bitch!?!"
"Your kissing cousin from Needles, California, home of the 20,000 acid hits and their opinions, 15,000 rounded up more or less or more."
"How do we reproduce?"
"With great difficulty in awkward positions and lots of blood, sweat, and red hot pokers, AIDS infested sluts and visitor shits."
"Sounds like Burroughs. Homosexuality and heroin, fucking young bovines... Hurray for SUCKAGE!!!"
At last, the threat from Nyholm got me risible. I needed that, right in the--
"MoooOOo MooOOO MoooOOOOOOO!"
"What was that?"
"What was what?"
"Cows in heat looking at trains, the kind you find at Woolco's toy department, where Leon Tolstoy works."
Naked Bill Murray turns Hellman on to Scientology, finally freeing him of working for Screw. His only wish was to fly with the fishes but the stench made him clench Blackfoot's big hard piece of Art, which was shaped so very badly. It fell on a felon, who mishandled his melon causing melancholy madness to millions of jollies, collies, colliers, dollies, dollars, dullards, replete with rhetorical ass-whuppings, beat-downs, and ball-gags (one word?).
Not one word. One word heard.
This thread 100% pure creamy filling me with dread DEAD EYE OOZE pushing religion up some gnome's bunghole licked by Nyhole, photographed in Kodak, published in AssmokersMag which Ed edited to read "RENAME THIS THREAD. Please before anime girl figures out how her penis works."
The bozo's added more imaginary lawsuits from imaginary people with imaginary testicles, a Rumplemintz habit, very used bongos, a frilly blouse, a hairy palm, and not enough lawyers on retainer masticating and litigating while constantly lactating with great vengeance and furious anger directed towards marsupials with learning disabilities (however it's spelled), dyslexia being one of my favourite types of soup.
"Campbell's Alphabet, Mmm..."
"Eat shit, ´´Granny."
"Prefer soup, 'Danny'. Goat fucking tranny."
"Wowie zowie, all! Old socks, out."
"You would know?"
"No, I wouldn't. Christianity is stupid, Communism is good!"
"Hans, edit please. Then kill yourself."
"Pete hates Hans. GUY GRANDER STRIKES AGAIN."
"Hey, who doesn't?"
"If a man is Jordan's capital, the power of Greyskull is overrated," says Skeletor the annoying taco folder with the sweaty soft french cheese under Samurai's man-tittys deliciously spread on two slices of walrus blubber bologna with a side of pommes frites, "Damn! I'm hungry. Let's BBQ something until it screams and votes LaRouche (whose anus is located near mid-body despite vigorous countermeasures against teddy bear picnics). Don't forget the Charmin."
You're soaking in goat vomit and a Tapir's slimy folk chanteuse canadienne, and fake Canadian time zones for trannies and pretend African-Americans. I will not stop until this page is gone because I am sick and tired of waiting for this page to load. And since I have time while I copy (What The Hell?) all my photos onto my new wdpassport external drive, tracing paper portfolio
How many posts does a woodchuck fuck when ducks wear short skirts, human skin shirts tailor- made for disgruntled Gutters defectors and narcissistic adolescents? Squeeze the base!
Base! How low my outlook is on Death Row for murdering Sting. Sting starred in "The Bride", which made Dune look like Star Wars instead of just three words, spoken with vigor. Mortis, unlike three, Nyholm, three!
"Respect the cock!"
"My bad dude."
"Jesus forgives you."
"Jesus forgives Hugh."
"Big man, pigman from Vermont. New Christy Minstrels sing 'Low, sweet chariot' comin' for to even the score."
"Bimp this thread."
"You know you fucked up when people tell you 'nice titties, fella'!"
"Woo woo woooooooo feeeeeeeelings, woo woo"
"Pomme de terre, voila! Mes pieds! Pieds de cochon."
Three little piggies said, "HOLY SHIT! This thread's been going on for 2 years! Congratulations!" Pork meat tacos bump this thread if you dare.
You unwashed neo-cons! Turn to page 666 when you finish sucking on naked Bill Murray! Carry on ogling girls in tank-tops, who giggle when you ask them about their age and Punisher shirts and their BUTTS! Not to mention you've no nuts.
Meanwhile, back at Justice Friends Headquarters, they got down with their bad robotic radioactive hamsters, rimming the Wondertwins. And poor Gleek watches with confusion the jaded sophisticates’ twin powers activate! Aquaman went ballistic punching Black Manta and then apologizing and punched him in the trout in his pants. Spongebob Troutpants likes to make enemies by posting at PETA dot COM under the username "Rancyd de Buttersnipe, Defender of the Dizzy Toilet Devils."
"Ohn Ohn Ohn!" Luke Pee collapsed. "Ohn Ohn Ohn!" in his bloodpool of Liefeld comics like Cable #7 or Cord #2. Maybe TinyHeadGuy #0 which sells for seven throat lozenges named Salvator diSalvator.
"O for a tuna, velut luna."
"Den Wein, den man mit Augen."
"Gefüllt mit unicorns."
"Moððe word fræt me þæt þuhte."
"What the fuck?" Mae West asked, summarizing this thread while embedded with the Latrine Brigade, America's elite troops, marching through faeces; facile, fascist faeces trodden under boots made of snow marked by huskies © Yellow Snow from, uh, lemonade?
Made from crystals. Do not eat without a chew of wacky tobaccy that sends ya to da moon! Santa weeps because he's so sensitive about video games with car crashes and "Hot Coffee" dropped on crotches muskily redolent of Grand Theft Auto.
"Warn the world Nyholm is Vap," said the retarded man from U.N.C.L.E. who got funky on a scooter stolen from the cabbage rolls and coffee club in...
"Fuck you, gnome. Tee he HEE"
"Piggy is mad enough to wreck this thread; why?"
"Suck it, Vap."
"Scared, eh, Danny? Or just drunk?"
"Just fucking stupid." Thus spoke Cupid with a wink, chugging his drink, watching the TV as it fell spiraling down the black hole of missing Peter McDonald and his cakes.
"Let's overthrow Ed."
"Oh yes, let's."
"Sic semper tyrannis!" A Tard reigns over all tardom.
(not a parody!)
(not a hoax!)
(not 'What If'!)
Cold, cruel reality!
Come the Revolution, "Vers La Bastille!" And then...guillotine?
"No, no, Nanette, pardon my French mistress, she's contracted because I am Henry the 8th on a bike." Bump this thread. Why should one bump this thread? Or post fake pictures of Vap with low resolution proving Danny lies about having socks on his feet?
"Where's my confession?"
"Really helpful. Really."
When Peter lies, an angel gets fucked up -- the Art Fight Thread -- and Alex gets to tuck his napkin into his creator's rights. Furthermore, spam this thread into Stone Age. Queens of the night time world sprinkled nasty thoughts about jealous people like that lying James (geedis) Bogner also known as "Senor Love Daddy" Grandmaster of Funk, son of Byford, Archbishop of Canterbury, residing up top!
So, in conclusion, taxes are due but not for two more weeks (four in Canada) but procrastination is my middle name, but they call me Mr. Tibbs! Slowly I turn step by step inch by inch I went outside to shit because lawns need fertilizin'. The terlet's full of little Buchets escaping slimy cloacas of mechanized space and time. If you like erotic duck pinups, then munch dick bags covered with béarnaise and sing about that breakfast cereal Erotic Balloon Animals™, fortified with nine vitabrites and mineralizations. Promotes regularity and spontaneous human combustion.
Only on CNN, and nowhere else, topless photos of stupid Paulo Keef! Don't let it use wheat paste on your Ipod. iPaste for food consumption, which, unlike breaking one's ankle is quite pleasant while hunting sharks in the salsa, rubbing it into Thor's blind date with destiny. A stripper from deep inside the jungles of pubescent arm bends over, and places one finger on her sweet potato pie, and up the chimney without a ladder she rose. "Merry Men's physical attributes repulse me". Then she removes her semblance of dignity and goes down with fake strippers (nude with alcohol) who like to...
"MOVE IT! MOVE IT OR LOSE!"
"JUST STOP SCREAMING!"
"Can I bust?
"Yes, you can carry my boobs, pimp my ride."
"Fork over, BeeYATCH."
Two cheese croissants, hold the cheese. Now spread some love all around the mighty jungle of your woman's mystery mouse where Jack missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess! denied being Al Columbia or Jack missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!'s evil twin. But then Kim fucked things up top! Can I sink any lower?
On his knees looking for coins and personal information, the French pederast got banned forever into the bowels of the jungle, the mighty jungle. The lion sweeps up after himself. Before eating his bag of dicks? “No thanks, really not that hungry! But instead I suck on Pebbles, Betty and Wilma. Start over.”
The Shadow knows what the hell is other people, except Vap in Canada, the nation of: moose, meters, and wheelchair assassination attempts. Don't forget about "You Can't Do-“
“FUCK THAT SHOW! I FUCKING HATE THAT GREEN SLIME!”
Bad childhood memories of Kim Mitchell. I don't know. Kim Mitchell raped and pillaged the suburbs of Sudbury, Ontario, where they plied, with cookies drowned in poutine, the citizens of Utopia are horrified by Dark Pickle in berserker mode, riding a unicorn, munching on tacos, which taste good! "I think ChrisW broke his other personal best for marathon bimbo banging during free fall with mile high vintage porn collection (big hairy snatches).”
“My belly hurts (no fake boobs) because my boobs (guys with sideburns) hurt like hell from the chafing of pink nipples on shag carpeting, producing enough electricity for my ipod and three toasters.”
“Toasters stray from Weemie's bathtub. Why?”
“Why do fools lend their tools to the ghouls who suck alum out of a big white bum, panhandling in front of the Sorbonne.”
“Dance little monkey! To the music on Ed's site which he wrote himself, in exchange for 30 second helpings of turnips off a truck driven by a Fish wielding samurai.”
“Can he bust?”
No, but he fucks salmon like Sting using Tantric marketing techniques from the seventh circle of Malebolgia's hell. David Porta slobbers while Veronica Lodge tickles his knob, while Hunter watches Batfan's latest post: naked Betty Cooper going lesbo with Sarah Jessica Parker, naked Betty Rubble, Scarlett Johanssen munching steak covered in a bag of antibacterial dish liquid made from dicks (the kind you don't bring home to ma and Garage A Trois).
“Hope you liked.”
“Very much so.”
Life just bounces like Pamela Anderson on a treadmill. Life goes on powering a stonemill in the windmills’ yeast infection basement of your mind. Life is hell on the living daylights out of the nighttime world, where cats are blowin' sax and pure Bolivian powder.
I lost track. Phoenix kills Cyclops. Logan is cooler. He kills Phoenix. Mystique is hot for fake Frenchmen reeking of garlic and lies. Magneto (Chris Claremont's baby) and Titanium Man were talking about Rustgirl's mighty powers, her nemesis WaterproofBoy, and the Knicks. The Oilers won, Canadians rioted politely in bacon sheds around 2 p.m.
“You still mad?”
“Naw, movie sucked.”
Most movies suck, some even swallow with proper renumeration and Brett Ratner prison shower scenes, extra Beltsander copies and sheep dip. New Age Hoser made me sad as a eunuch because Weemie is a wonderful boon to superior officers---
“Weemie gobbles cocktails that aren't filled with jizz.”
“What's a ‘cockolate’?”
Weemie's favorite food: Cadbury's pud fondue. “Luigi's pizza! Mmmmmm,” said Weemie while sucking Luigi's cock. Get yourself a nice-a spicy meatball on Weemie's tonsils while he gargles Mario's viscous spunk. It tastes like Chicken? Duck? Recine! Organic robots always hold the Pickle against Batwoman's thighs.
(she's a lesbian)
(can I watch?)
(I'll be quiet)
But Batwoman won't. She likes to not be quiet. Weemie sucks cock. She also likes Weemie's fanboy fellatio, but she dislikes wine enemas, spaghetti and sheep dip. Dave Sim sucks the life from Weemie's tiny member. Alex is obsessed with Weemie's cock because he's weird. Buchets love cock, and Weemie fellates, and Beaujolais enemas. Ohn! Ohn! Ohn!
The quick brown stench of death made me wish this story ended. No such luck. Weemie likes what? Hard throbbing penises in his mouth. New Age Hoser has mutated again just as the erotic balloon animals meet Flash Gordon in the jungle. Ain’t no party when Weemie deepthroats.
I hear violins and also violence and heavy machinery in Weemie’s mouth. Whose penis now? Ed's. Diseased and reeking of feces, that’s just nasty. He thinks it talks to him in fake French, the language of poets, drunks and message board bullies. Buy shitty comics!
Bump bump bump on the ceiling where I dance with no pants or self respect, awareness or preservation. I fall down on Siren's trampoline-like breasts, which hurt her knees when she pees. When I think about that, I get all misty and shoot people while quoting "Garfield". President James Garfield bumped this thread, for his country 'tis of thee, naked Bill Murray, of thee I keep posting bullshit. Weemie sucks cock but Vap swallows psychoactive Vermont mushrooms smothered in butter, man-ass butter from the socket of Saint David Porta, who believes it cures herpes. A disease spread by Dirty Danny who is obsessed by men’s fannies. (three words, Siren) Why three, Pickle? Vagabond neuter. Space bear, taco. ya'll fuckin up in Nap's fishshoppe where health code inspectors are bribed to change underpants for low prices and less filling than a flounder. Never touched 'er. Blackfoot’s a cracker!! Crack her? I just sell coke. YOU'RE OUTTA CONTROL!!!
So's your mom available? I need something to stick this pogo stick, dipped in horseradish, topped with cheese, and slathered with Sweetstick's anal gravy, like Mom makes every other Sunday, while being porked, sauced, and leeched. Dinner is served! If you can't resist the aroma of fresh yams, twenty-four hundred dollars will buy Ed's used-up porn-tastic dental floss.
Come gather round, page 50 bound. Jimmy crack corn and I don't like Steppenwolf's album Monster, but Steely Groin's latest CD: More Beans, Ma! really makes me say, "Weemie sucks The Big One.” Twenty-four seven, plus sales tax and fetid undergarments of Ursula. Hitler, Queen of the Hamsters, ate pie (she likes pie) so do the Mussolini Headkick, the latest dance craze sweeping the nation! Why is it that blonde bimbos always get invited to Peruvian weddings in leap years? Because, that's why!
Ask not what for whom the marbled buncake tolls its bells, it gnomes with Ugnaughts and rhymes with "gay hangovers". Not that there's three words above.
“Actually, there are.”
“No, there aren't.”
“Are you sure?”
“Contracted ‘is’: ‘ 's’.”
“Four words, there.”
“Boys, boys, boys! Rhinorooter strikes again!”
“Is nowhere safe?”
“That question leads up Gnomie's ass.”
“It's Page 50!!!”
“Worst book ever!”
“Nuh-uh, Neil.”
Cerebus is worse than your mother's cock-sucking Weemie. Dang that's cold. Colder than a decapitated Weemie hostage,forced to listen to Cat Stevens and Madonna's collaboration: "Ooh, Baby, It's Weemie's Severed Head." (DJ Gnomezilla Mix), backing vocals by Ramzi bin al-Shaib and His Ululating rabid helper monkeys. It rocks like a muscle-bound two word phrase. Must be Duckfucker since Donald's hemorrhaging on NAP's "Artwork". And rubber cement still makes a scrotum look wrinkly enough to appear on CBC News fellated by Weemie our top story! Gnomes suck it! Snitching on TCJ is a tradition I proudly uphold! Eat them dicks! Weemie sucks them, night after night in the ghetto another little baby gnome sucks it and his mama has regrets about reaching page 50.
Weemie Sucks Cock
"Nebraska sounds boring."
"It beats Louisiana to a pulp."
"Touché, mon ami, Cheech & Chong, whose name means 'he who devours your entrails and thoroughly enjoys it'."
"The End (possibly)."
"What the hell?"
"That's it exactly."
When you wish for revenge, you look wonderful tonight as you eat hot bakeapple pie cooked the way Ed's Grandmother used to before the accident, in which several metric tonnes of french vanilla, as per usual. 50 second orgasms were scientifically recorded in greasy detail amid post-funk-adelic stress patterns created by Moby. The great whale mated with Roseanne who insisted that she get everything coming to her.
"Wow, page 33."
"How about that."
"Take good care of our baby available at http://www.comicon.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=6;t=007243"
"He looks retarded."
TARDS R US in conjunction with Yanni cover bands proudly present Turd Gauthier and his Amazing Pocket Prod Experience! Live at the limits of $18.95, Grandma's retirement fund! FREE LIVE SUICIDE! You go first to sign Brittany's plaster cast. Then spell "Britney" correctly.
"B... R... I... tit knee. Right?"
"Brittany in France?"
"Overrated cum dumpster."
"Brittany" is correct. So is "bimbo."
Spears' mom disagrees. "E-mail my heart "
Wrong for Britney. Right for Brittany.
In the zone, Weemie takes one in the nutsack. Allah be praised! Death to Infidels! Jihad or bust a move on.org or orgnot, that is the way of gnomes.
"Um... uhhhhh, I...umm...”
“Knock. Knock."
"Who's there, bitch!?!"
"Your kissing cousin from Needles, California, home of the 20,000 acid hits and their opinions, 15,000 rounded up more or less or more."
"How do we reproduce?"
"With great difficulty in awkward positions and lots of blood, sweat, and red hot pokers, AIDS infested sluts and visitor shits."
"Sounds like Burroughs. Homosexuality and heroin, fucking young bovines... Hurray for SUCKAGE!!!"
At last, the threat from Nyholm got me risible. I needed that, right in the--
"MoooOOo MooOOO MoooOOOOOOO!"
"What was that?"
"What was what?"
"Cows in heat looking at trains, the kind you find at Woolco's toy department, where Leon Tolstoy works."
Naked Bill Murray turns Hellman on to Scientology, finally freeing him of working for Screw. His only wish was to fly with the fishes but the stench made him clench Blackfoot's big hard piece of Art, which was shaped so very badly. It fell on a felon, who mishandled his melon causing melancholy madness to millions of jollies, collies, colliers, dollies, dollars, dullards, replete with rhetorical ass-whuppings, beat-downs, and ball-gags (one word?).
Not one word. One word heard.
This thread 100% pure creamy filling me with dread DEAD EYE OOZE pushing religion up some gnome's bunghole licked by Nyhole, photographed in Kodak, published in AssmokersMag which Ed edited to read "RENAME THIS THREAD. Please before anime girl figures out how her penis works."
The bozo's added more imaginary lawsuits from imaginary people with imaginary testicles, a Rumplemintz habit, very used bongos, a frilly blouse, a hairy palm, and not enough lawyers on retainer masticating and litigating while constantly lactating with great vengeance and furious anger directed towards marsupials with learning disabilities (however it's spelled), dyslexia being one of my favourite types of soup.
"Campbell's Alphabet, Mmm..."
"Eat shit, ´´Granny."
"Prefer soup, 'Danny'. Goat fucking tranny."
"Wowie zowie, all! Old socks, out."
"You would know?"
"No, I wouldn't. Christianity is stupid, Communism is good!"
"Hans, edit please. Then kill yourself."
"Pete hates Hans. GUY GRANDER STRIKES AGAIN."
"Hey, who doesn't?"
"If a man is Jordan's capital, the power of Greyskull is overrated," says Skeletor the annoying taco folder with the sweaty soft french cheese under Samurai's man-tittys deliciously spread on two slices of walrus blubber bologna with a side of pommes frites, "Damn! I'm hungry. Let's BBQ something until it screams and votes LaRouche (whose anus is located near mid-body despite vigorous countermeasures against teddy bear picnics). Don't forget the Charmin."
You're soaking in goat vomit and a Tapir's slimy folk chanteuse canadienne, and fake Canadian time zones for trannies and pretend African-Americans. I will not stop until this page is gone because I am sick and tired of waiting for this page to load. And since I have time while I copy (What The Hell?) all my photos onto my new wdpassport external drive, tracing paper portfolio
How many posts does a woodchuck fuck when ducks wear short skirts, human skin shirts tailor- made for disgruntled Gutters defectors and narcissistic adolescents? Squeeze the base!
Base! How low my outlook is on Death Row for murdering Sting. Sting starred in "The Bride", which made Dune look like Star Wars instead of just three words, spoken with vigor. Mortis, unlike three, Nyholm, three!
"Respect the cock!"
"My bad dude."
"Jesus forgives you."
"Jesus forgives Hugh."
"Big man, pigman from Vermont. New Christy Minstrels sing 'Low, sweet chariot' comin' for to even the score."
"Bimp this thread."
"You know you fucked up when people tell you 'nice titties, fella'!"
"Woo woo woooooooo feeeeeeeelings, woo woo"
"Pomme de terre, voila! Mes pieds! Pieds de cochon."
Three little piggies said, "HOLY SHIT! This thread's been going on for 2 years! Congratulations!" Pork meat tacos bump this thread if you dare.
You unwashed neo-cons! Turn to page 666 when you finish sucking on naked Bill Murray! Carry on ogling girls in tank-tops, who giggle when you ask them about their age and Punisher shirts and their BUTTS! Not to mention you've no nuts.
Meanwhile, back at Justice Friends Headquarters, they got down with their bad robotic radioactive hamsters, rimming the Wondertwins. And poor Gleek watches with confusion the jaded sophisticates’ twin powers activate! Aquaman went ballistic punching Black Manta and then apologizing and punched him in the trout in his pants. Spongebob Troutpants likes to make enemies by posting at PETA dot COM under the username "Rancyd de Buttersnipe, Defender of the Dizzy Toilet Devils."
"Ohn Ohn Ohn!" Luke Pee collapsed. "Ohn Ohn Ohn!" in his bloodpool of Liefeld comics like Cable #7 or Cord #2. Maybe TinyHeadGuy #0 which sells for seven throat lozenges named Salvator diSalvator.
"O for a tuna, velut luna."
"Den Wein, den man mit Augen."
"Gefüllt mit unicorns."
"Moððe word fræt me þæt þuhte."
"What the fuck?" Mae West asked, summarizing this thread while embedded with the Latrine Brigade, America's elite troops, marching through faeces; facile, fascist faeces trodden under boots made of snow marked by huskies © Yellow Snow from, uh, lemonade?
Made from crystals. Do not eat without a chew of wacky tobaccy that sends ya to da moon! Santa weeps because he's so sensitive about video games with car crashes and "Hot Coffee" dropped on crotches muskily redolent of Grand Theft Auto.
"Warn the world Nyholm is Vap," said the retarded man from U.N.C.L.E. who got funky on a scooter stolen from the cabbage rolls and coffee club in...
"Fuck you, gnome. Tee he HEE"
"Piggy is mad enough to wreck this thread; why?"
"Suck it, Vap."
"Scared, eh, Danny? Or just drunk?"
"Just fucking stupid." Thus spoke Cupid with a wink, chugging his drink, watching the TV as it fell spiraling down the black hole of missing Peter McDonald and his cakes.
"Let's overthrow Ed."
"Oh yes, let's."
"Sic semper tyrannis!" A Tard reigns over all tardom.
(not a parody!)
(not a hoax!)
(not 'What If'!)
Cold, cruel reality!
Come the Revolution, "Vers La Bastille!" And then...guillotine?
"No, no, Nanette, pardon my French mistress, she's contracted because I am Henry the 8th on a bike." Bump this thread. Why should one bump this thread? Or post fake pictures of Vap with low resolution proving Danny lies about having socks on his feet?
"Where's my confession?"
"Really helpful. Really."
When Peter lies, an angel gets fucked up -- the Art Fight Thread -- and Alex gets to tuck his napkin into his creator's rights. Furthermore, spam this thread into Stone Age. Queens of the night time world sprinkled nasty thoughts about jealous people like that lying James (geedis) Bogner also known as "Senor Love Daddy" Grandmaster of Funk, son of Byford, Archbishop of Canterbury, residing up top!
So, in conclusion, taxes are due but not for two more weeks (four in Canada) but procrastination is my middle name, but they call me Mr. Tibbs! Slowly I turn step by step inch by inch I went outside to shit because lawns need fertilizin'. The terlet's full of little Buchets escaping slimy cloacas of mechanized space and time. If you like erotic duck pinups, then munch dick bags covered with béarnaise and sing about that breakfast cereal Erotic Balloon Animals™, fortified with nine vitabrites and mineralizations. Promotes regularity and spontaneous human combustion.
Only on CNN, and nowhere else, topless photos of stupid Paulo Keef! Don't let it use wheat paste on your Ipod. iPaste for food consumption, which, unlike breaking one's ankle is quite pleasant while hunting sharks in the salsa, rubbing it into Thor's blind date with destiny. A stripper from deep inside the jungles of pubescent arm bends over, and places one finger on her sweet potato pie, and up the chimney without a ladder she rose. "Merry Men's physical attributes repulse me". Then she removes her semblance of dignity and goes down with fake strippers (nude with alcohol) who like to...
"MOVE IT! MOVE IT OR LOSE!"
"JUST STOP SCREAMING!"
"Can I bust?
"Yes, you can carry my boobs, pimp my ride."
"Fork over, BeeYATCH."
Two cheese croissants, hold the cheese. Now spread some love all around the mighty jungle of your woman's mystery mouse where Jack missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess! denied being Al Columbia or Jack missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!missmanners is a goddess!'s evil twin. But then Kim fucked things up top! Can I sink any lower?
On his knees looking for coins and personal information, the French pederast got banned forever into the bowels of the jungle, the mighty jungle. The lion sweeps up after himself. Before eating his bag of dicks? “No thanks, really not that hungry! But instead I suck on Pebbles, Betty and Wilma. Start over.”
The Shadow knows what the hell is other people, except Vap in Canada, the nation of: moose, meters, and wheelchair assassination attempts. Don't forget about "You Can't Do-“
“FUCK THAT SHOW! I FUCKING HATE THAT GREEN SLIME!”
Bad childhood memories of Kim Mitchell. I don't know. Kim Mitchell raped and pillaged the suburbs of Sudbury, Ontario, where they plied, with cookies drowned in poutine, the citizens of Utopia are horrified by Dark Pickle in berserker mode, riding a unicorn, munching on tacos, which taste good! "I think ChrisW broke his other personal best for marathon bimbo banging during free fall with mile high vintage porn collection (big hairy snatches).”
“My belly hurts (no fake boobs) because my boobs (guys with sideburns) hurt like hell from the chafing of pink nipples on shag carpeting, producing enough electricity for my ipod and three toasters.”
“Toasters stray from Weemie's bathtub. Why?”
“Why do fools lend their tools to the ghouls who suck alum out of a big white bum, panhandling in front of the Sorbonne.”
“Dance little monkey! To the music on Ed's site which he wrote himself, in exchange for 30 second helpings of turnips off a truck driven by a Fish wielding samurai.”
“Can he bust?”
No, but he fucks salmon like Sting using Tantric marketing techniques from the seventh circle of Malebolgia's hell. David Porta slobbers while Veronica Lodge tickles his knob, while Hunter watches Batfan's latest post: naked Betty Cooper going lesbo with Sarah Jessica Parker, naked Betty Rubble, Scarlett Johanssen munching steak covered in a bag of antibacterial dish liquid made from dicks (the kind you don't bring home to ma and Garage A Trois).
“Hope you liked.”
“Very much so.”
Life just bounces like Pamela Anderson on a treadmill. Life goes on powering a stonemill in the windmills’ yeast infection basement of your mind. Life is hell on the living daylights out of the nighttime world, where cats are blowin' sax and pure Bolivian powder.
I lost track. Phoenix kills Cyclops. Logan is cooler. He kills Phoenix. Mystique is hot for fake Frenchmen reeking of garlic and lies. Magneto (Chris Claremont's baby) and Titanium Man were talking about Rustgirl's mighty powers, her nemesis WaterproofBoy, and the Knicks. The Oilers won, Canadians rioted politely in bacon sheds around 2 p.m.
“You still mad?”
“Naw, movie sucked.”
Most movies suck, some even swallow with proper renumeration and Brett Ratner prison shower scenes, extra Beltsander copies and sheep dip. New Age Hoser made me sad as a eunuch because Weemie is a wonderful boon to superior officers---
“Weemie gobbles cocktails that aren't filled with jizz.”
“What's a ‘cockolate’?”
Weemie's favorite food: Cadbury's pud fondue. “Luigi's pizza! Mmmmmm,” said Weemie while sucking Luigi's cock. Get yourself a nice-a spicy meatball on Weemie's tonsils while he gargles Mario's viscous spunk. It tastes like Chicken? Duck? Recine! Organic robots always hold the Pickle against Batwoman's thighs.
(she's a lesbian)
(can I watch?)
(I'll be quiet)
But Batwoman won't. She likes to not be quiet. Weemie sucks cock. She also likes Weemie's fanboy fellatio, but she dislikes wine enemas, spaghetti and sheep dip. Dave Sim sucks the life from Weemie's tiny member. Alex is obsessed with Weemie's cock because he's weird. Buchets love cock, and Weemie fellates, and Beaujolais enemas. Ohn! Ohn! Ohn!
The quick brown stench of death made me wish this story ended. No such luck. Weemie likes what? Hard throbbing penises in his mouth. New Age Hoser has mutated again just as the erotic balloon animals meet Flash Gordon in the jungle. Ain’t no party when Weemie deepthroats.
I hear violins and also violence and heavy machinery in Weemie’s mouth. Whose penis now? Ed's. Diseased and reeking of feces, that’s just nasty. He thinks it talks to him in fake French, the language of poets, drunks and message board bullies. Buy shitty comics!
Bump bump bump on the ceiling where I dance with no pants or self respect, awareness or preservation. I fall down on Siren's trampoline-like breasts, which hurt her knees when she pees. When I think about that, I get all misty and shoot people while quoting "Garfield". President James Garfield bumped this thread, for his country 'tis of thee, naked Bill Murray, of thee I keep posting bullshit. Weemie sucks cock but Vap swallows psychoactive Vermont mushrooms smothered in butter, man-ass butter from the socket of Saint David Porta, who believes it cures herpes. A disease spread by Dirty Danny who is obsessed by men’s fannies. (three words, Siren) Why three, Pickle? Vagabond neuter. Space bear, taco. ya'll fuckin up in Nap's fishshoppe where health code inspectors are bribed to change underpants for low prices and less filling than a flounder. Never touched 'er. Blackfoot’s a cracker!! Crack her? I just sell coke. YOU'RE OUTTA CONTROL!!!
So's your mom available? I need something to stick this pogo stick, dipped in horseradish, topped with cheese, and slathered with Sweetstick's anal gravy, like Mom makes every other Sunday, while being porked, sauced, and leeched. Dinner is served! If you can't resist the aroma of fresh yams, twenty-four hundred dollars will buy Ed's used-up porn-tastic dental floss.
Come gather round, page 50 bound. Jimmy crack corn and I don't like Steppenwolf's album Monster, but Steely Groin's latest CD: More Beans, Ma! really makes me say, "Weemie sucks The Big One.” Twenty-four seven, plus sales tax and fetid undergarments of Ursula. Hitler, Queen of the Hamsters, ate pie (she likes pie) so do the Mussolini Headkick, the latest dance craze sweeping the nation! Why is it that blonde bimbos always get invited to Peruvian weddings in leap years? Because, that's why!
Ask not what for whom the marbled buncake tolls its bells, it gnomes with Ugnaughts and rhymes with "gay hangovers". Not that there's three words above.
“Actually, there are.”
“No, there aren't.”
“Are you sure?”
“Contracted ‘is’: ‘ 's’.”
“Four words, there.”
“Boys, boys, boys! Rhinorooter strikes again!”
“Is nowhere safe?”
“That question leads up Gnomie's ass.”
“It's Page 50!!!”
“Worst book ever!”
“Nuh-uh, Neil.”
Cerebus is worse than your mother's cock-sucking Weemie. Dang that's cold. Colder than a decapitated Weemie hostage,forced to listen to Cat Stevens and Madonna's collaboration: "Ooh, Baby, It's Weemie's Severed Head." (DJ Gnomezilla Mix), backing vocals by Ramzi bin al-Shaib and His Ululating rabid helper monkeys. It rocks like a muscle-bound two word phrase. Must be Duckfucker since Donald's hemorrhaging on NAP's "Artwork". And rubber cement still makes a scrotum look wrinkly enough to appear on CBC News fellated by Weemie our top story! Gnomes suck it! Snitching on TCJ is a tradition I proudly uphold! Eat them dicks! Weemie sucks them, night after night in the ghetto another little baby gnome sucks it and his mama has regrets about reaching page 50.
