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TKR Story Hour: The Lady In The Basement

'Gear said:
I'm not interested in being associated with a story written to troll Eloisel. It's not the work Saint. It's Jacks purpose for enlisting your services I don't want to be involved with.
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Well, Gear, you know you can always commission a story of your own from me. Do you have my email or do you need me to give it to you again?
 
'Gear said:
An interesting fella like myself would write it if I needed it.
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Show off for me, bro! Link me to something you've written that I can read! :D

'Course, as a writer yourself you know this: Nothing you write is anything you can read for fun. You're not going to surprise yourself no matter how good the plot twist is, unless you have MPD.
 
'Gear said:
Did you see where I wrote 'if'?

Wait a second- When did I say I was a writer?
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Just seemed it would make sense that you are one, what with what you said before about, "If I needed it, I'd write it myself." Kind of leads a gent to believe that you've got the professional skills, professional experience and natural talent to carry it off. I was hoping you do, I always love a good read, myself.

Of course, being as I'm someone who does it for a living, I can also tell you that, when you've spent between 40 and 80 hours thinking about a given story non-stop, the last thing you're going to turn to for entertainment is the story you just spent Hell with for 40-80 hours. On account of, among other things: 1. You already know every single plot twist in it, and 2. The urge to rewrite every niggling little loose thread distracts you from actually enjoying anything about what you wrote.
 
Well, I wasn't being sarcastic. If you can write a story for yourself and then genuinely enjoy it as if you're reading the work of another person for the very first time, that's an unheard-of gift. I wish I could do that.
 
Jibbles said:
Every time I see your AV, if it is you, I feel as if I've met you in person before.
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Guess I just have one of those generic "everyman" faces. I was once stopped by a single mother in the parking lot of a grocery store in a state I'd never been to who was convinced I was her husband until she heard my voice.
 
The Saint said:
Guess I just have one of those generic "everyman" faces. I was once stopped by a single mother in the parking lot of a grocery store in a state I'd never been to who was convinced I was her husband until she heard my voice.
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I want to call you "Douglas" for some reason.
 
It was a pleasure doing business with you, btw. I know the diff between the creation and the finished product, which was why I commissioned you, once I saw where the talent lied.
 
Once in Vegas a carload of gangbanger screeched up next to me and shouted "Ricky!" at me. I was pretty fucking glad right then that I wasn't Ricky.
 
"I tell you what, Ricky, you are truly blessed. These two are two in a million, just like Carley's ta-tas. You won't find another rack like that, I guarantee it."
 
There is something I want to get off my chest. It's about that summer, when you went away to community college. I got an offer to do Playgirl Magazine, and I did it. I did a full spread for Playgirl Magazine. I mean spread man, I pulled my butt apart and stuff. I was totally nude. it was weird, I-- I mean you probably didn't hear about it because I went under the name of Mike Honcho. But I just wanted you to know that. If you can hear me, if it got into your brain somehow. That I spread my buttcheeks as Mike Honcho.
 
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