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What's up.

Laker_Girl

Mrs. Big Dick McGee
As you all know a couple of weeks ago I'd had it, life was bogging me down. Things are better, not tons better but a little better so I decided to come back and do what I enjoy for once, I'm tired of trying to make everyone happy.

Let's see, where to start...

My niece and nephew's mom is back in the picture, she's been decent but I don't know if I trust her yet. She had Christmas dinner with my family and my brother acted like a total turd and rode his huff on out of the celebration. Needless to say, he was not missed.

Over the couple of weeks that the kids were off school their mom stayed with friends in town and spent almost every day with the kids (what a relief) and the shocking secret that their dad never plays with them and all he does was talk to his girlfriend on the phone and play poker on the computer was revealed to their mother...She was stunned. (smell the sarcasm)

My brother got papers saying that his ex brother and sister-in-law were willing to drop the guardianship action as long as visitation can be established in family court, my brother, being advised by my mother, declined. Were visitation to be established that would make him responsible for his ex wife's family's visitation and that is unnecessary since his ex wife sees the kids as much as she wants, she can decide when her family can and can not see the children. He also doesn't want to give his ex brother and sister-in-law a voice in family court. His ex sister-in-law E-mailed me and asked me what they should do and I told her to just drop the case, Ron isn't and will never keep the kids from them because...

After a huge blow up between myself, my brother and my mother he informed my mother that he would be moving to Alabama to live with his trailer park trash hillbillie girlfriend and would be taking the children with him. I took the time to research the Godforsaken shit hole he's moving to and would like to move his children to (he has a fantasy that it's better for them, he's very, very wrong) and it's got a population of 6,612. I live in a city of 250,000 and I run into someone I know almost everywhere I go, you couldn't take a shit without everyone knowing in a town of just 6,000 and lets not even get into it's high crime and teen pregnancy rate and it's giant meth problem. I also researched his hick whore and she one kid, in jail for distribution of narcotics, two grandchildren who are wards of the state and she literally lives in a trailer park. My ex sister-in-law is no prize but I thought after a divorce you were suppose to step up, not down. Anyway, I told my brother what I'd found out and I told him that I told his ex wife what I'd found out and never mind that he hadn't filed the proper paper work to take his kids out of state no one was going to let him take his kids out of state, least of all their mom. He'll leave, he's a real fucking bastard like that and my parents will keep the children until their mom is well enough to have them live with her.

On to that, turns out the ex is on medical disability and that pays 2/3 so the ex is making a handsome sum to get her head straight and has rented a four bedroom house in the neighborhood she and my brother used to live in. She says she doesn't like my city but she doesn't want to move the kids around anymore. She also won't be going back to her old high stress job, she's going to find something more flexible which is excellent. My parents assured her that they'll help her until the day they die but she has to continue to do the right thing, she seemed touched. Hell things are getting so cozy that the ex stayed the night at my parents house last weekend. The shit's weird but I trust that my parents know what they're doing.

My brother had been having bitch fits all week and he just took off to Alabama to see his whore nevermind that he just saw her two weeks ago and still owes my parents money for his kids' Christmas presents. It's all about him and his dick, fuck that the kids started school again today and fuck that everyone else has to care for them...Then again it's not like he cares for his kids when he's here so really it's nothing but he's still and inconsiderate little shit stain.

I can't say I'm thrilled with the ex either, she's going to the Rose Bowl game tomorrow while I'll be caring for her children. Fuck man, if she's well enough to go to a football game, she's well enough to be a daily part of her kids' lives. I swear it's like my brother and his ex wife are the aunt and uncle and my mom and dad and I are the parents. This shit's getting old.

So that's it...Oh and I'm buying a condo I should be moved by March.
 
I work during the day, but I feel like I'm watching a soap!

Welcome back, LG. Good to see ya!

Oh, and HAPPY NEW YEAR. Things WILL be better this year. And congrats on the new place!
 
Why is any of this your problem? Sounds like your brother and all his women have left a trailer park empty somewhere, you should let the in-laws adopt the kids so they'll have a chance at a decent life. Also, mind your business because there is nothing worse than assorted family members who can't stay the hell out of it. All the shit you say about ex-brother and sisters-in-law, remember they're also saying that about you.

Some people just love the Springer-style drama...go rake your own back yard and stop counting the leaves in your brother's.
 
^^The kids live a wonderful life, my parents and I take care of them. Catch up or shut the fuck up.

My babies are honor roll students, live in a gorgeous home, have constant attention, are well mannered and well dressed. They have every material thing on the planet except an XBOX 360 and IT'S ON ORDER! My parents and I have provided for them what their parents and my ex sister-in-law's family haven't, a stable home enviornment and I am so goddamn proud of myself for rising to the challenge I could just shit. I did something that no one else was willing to do and unfortunately in the eyes of the law I have no rights so I'm a little peeved, please excuse me, you giant moron wrapped in an idiot.

That said, if my ex sister-in-law or her family had anything negative to say about me I'd be surprised to hear it. I mean considering I'm the one that made visitation possible between all of them and I'm the one helping care for the children and none of it is my resposibility beyond just being a decent human being. But if they did have something nasty to say there's a very good chance I'd hardly give a fuck, I'm not that kind of person. Yeah, boo hoo, a woman who abandoned her children and a man who's as nutty as a can of Planters don't like me! What ever will I do?!?!?! Give me a break. :roll:

And as for taking my brother's inventory, he isn't raising his kids, I am so I believe I have every right in the world to take inventory, I'm sure you'd agree. :bigass:

Oh and I'd give my first born to end all of this drama but those who don't create it are sometimes subject to it anyway.
 
Laker_Girl said:
So that's it...Oh and I'm buying a condo I should be moved by March.

Firstly I used to really like you - call me shallow, but now it's love ;)


As for everything else, that is far too much BS for me to get to grips with. Sounds awful.
 
I forgot one other thing that happened while I was gone...I burned my hand. I was baking Christmas cookies and my nephew was standing behind me, I didn't want to jerk back and hit him in the face with my elbow so I just let my hand sizzle. It blistered and now it's scarred and peeling...Is that love? I think so.
 
Gagh said:
Firstly I used to really like you - call me shallow, but now it's love ;)

I love you back. ;)


As for everything else, that is far too much BS for me to get to grips with. Sounds awful.

Ain't that the truth. Every now and again think about running away...FAR away.
 
Maybe to the Mid-Atlantic states??

Seriously, guys, LG has had it bad for the last year. The last six months have been hell. She's easily the best person I've had the priviledge of knowing personally, and I consider it an honor that she calls me friend. She does things for these kids tirelessly and without complaint; the only place she ever lets it all out is here on TK.

She's a saint, bonafide and certified.

Anyone wanna ring up Pope Benny, or shall I? :) :smooch:
 
Laker_Girl said:
^^The kids live a wonderful life, my parents and I take care of them. Catch up or shut the fuck up.

My babies are honor roll students, live in a gorgeous home, have constant attention, are well mannered and well dressed. They have every material thing on the planet except an XBOX 360 and IT'S ON ORDER! My parents and I have provided for them what their parents and my ex sister-in-law's family haven't, a stable home enviornment and I am so goddamn proud of myself for rising to the challenge I could just shit. I did something that no one else was willing to do and unfortunately in the eyes of the law I have no rights so I'm a little peeved, please excuse me, you giant moron wrapped in an idiot.

That said, if my ex sister-in-law or her family had anything negative to say about me I'd be surprised to hear it. I mean considering I'm the one that made visitation possible between all of them and I'm the one helping care for the children and none of it is my resposibility beyond just being a decent human being. But if they did have something nasty to say there's a very good chance I'd hardly give a fuck, I'm not that kind of person. Yeah, boo hoo, a woman who abandoned her children and a man who's as nutty as a can of Planters don't like me! What ever will I do?!?!?! Give me a break. :roll:

And as for taking my brother's inventory, he isn't raising his kids, I am so I believe I have every right in the world to take inventory, I'm sure you'd agree. :bigass:

Oh and I'd give my first born to end all of this drama but those who don't create it are sometimes subject to it anyway.

Well, let's review: you say you and your parents are "raising" your brother's kids, that they don't lack for material possessions, that you buy them all kinds of shit to make their little lives better.

Bully for you. Don't hurt yourself patting your own back, but if this is really true it is to be admired. HOWEVER...

None, and I mean NONE, of that Norman Rockwell sentiment is reflected in your first post. Instead, you continually badmouth your brother, his ex, her family, and whatever unfortunate new girl he's hooked up with. You whine that he hasn't PAID you for all the "wonderful gifts" your kids don't lack for, (and I think somehow you've missed the entire fucking point of Christams and the giving spirit here). You also indicate that you care enough about your brother's doings to research your brother's plans and badmouth the entire town he wants to move to. You are some piece of work, you know? No wonder the guy's a meth head, if I had the kind of family support you seem to offer I'd be riding the powder trail myself.

I got news for you Laker Girl: I have a brother and ex-sister in law in a very similar situation to yours. My brother stays with me because he's pissed off so many people they don't trust him. He barely pays for basic upkeep, and I, not my parents, foot the rest. He has six kids and a shitty job. When they came for a week at Christmas, I not only put them up and paid for all the food, I bought a bunch of extra gifts so they'd have a little extra, while at the same time allowing him to slide on his bi-weekly room and board. All of this put me in a tight spot financially, and continues to do so. I am frequently called on to provide transport, accomodations, money, and other support for kids that aren't mine and over whom I have no legal rights.

But I have never felt the urge to badmouth him, his ex wife, his new girlfriends, or her family. Worse yet, I've never gone online to trash any of them to complete strangers they don't even know.

You need to take a step back, look hard and long at what you call "support", and decide if you're really helping your brother or just finding a way to make yourself feel superior. And I'll say again: if you want to raise your brother's kids or help them through a difficult time in their lives, please continue to do so. But shut the fuck up about their dad, their mom, their other relatives, or any of dad's new girlfriends. The kids don't need to know it to love their parents, you don't need to know it to provide help, and people like me SURE AS FUCK shouldn't need to know it.


Now you can post back pretending I'm an idiot and call me names, you seem practiced at that, or you can defend your inappropriate remarks about your family. Either way, I'd prefer you take a minute to thoughtfully consider some of the things I've said here, and make some changes. For the kids' sake, please.
 
Hey, Donovan? Stop being such an ass. Trolling a woman who's sacrificing so much in order to take responsibility for her brother's kids is just lame. Let the woman vent a bit. This is probably the only place she can.
 
Donovan, you're an ass.

L_G did not ask to be in the spot she's in. Her frustration and sometimes disgust over how her brother and sister-in-law are treating their own flesh and blood are understandable. Yes, she badmouths them, but deservedly so. Besides, with all the pressure and responsibility she's under, she needs a place to let it all hang out. This is the place. You don't like it? Stop reading the thread.

L_G, it sounds like your sister in law is trying to do the right thing, but is still not ready for the total responsibility of being a mom. Just be there when she falls, to put the kids back on the right track. Don't expect too much from her, tho.

Yay for the condo!!! Enjoy it...you've earned it. :D

Oh, and no matter what others might say....always feel free to dump on us crazies at TK. We're here to listen. :)
 
Nonsense. If Laker Girl is truly taking care of her brother's kids, then she should be commended for that. But to begrudge that fact with bitter complaining, up to and including disparaging remarks about all the people involved, is inappropriate. You remind me of various foster parents I've dealt with over the years, who did great deeds by opening their homes to kids nobody wanted, but who never failed to take the opportunity to remind people of their sacrifice.

You don't think this bitterness and anger bleeds through where the kids can feel it? You don't think a kid feels pretty worthless knowing they are a "burden"? And you don't think a kid loves his or her parents no matter what kind of pukes they may be?

In all fairness to Laker Girl: I am currently embroiled in difficult custody issues of my own, and you may be unfairly targeted by frustration meant for others. But I also know what it's like to be the kid who has to sit and listen to what pieces of shit his parents are, and what a thankless job it is taking care of someone else's offspring.

That's not trolling or being an ass: that's simple truth, and is one of the few areas in life I give enough of a shit about to comment seriously on. If you are truly taking care of your niece and nephew, do it for their sake alone, not for the sake of trashing your brother. He may deserve it, but they certainly don't.

As for being an ass: Morrighan and Friday, you're probably right nine times in ten. But what I really am is a man who takes his responsibilities as a father and as an uncle very seriously, and I don't ask for a cookie just because I fed them or bought them stuff. Laker Girl's brother sound like he is every bit as bad as she says. She won't change him by bitterly tearing him down either here, or in life. She will, however find that her sharp words cut unexpected targets.
 
^You're assuming that she speaks like this around the kids. If you're right, then you have a valid point. But if you aren't, I think you owe LG an apology.
 
Kids hear all kinds of things we don't think they do. I will apologize up front to Laker Girl for any unfortunate flak she caught for my past associations, current frustrations and pre-existing dispositions that may have little to do with her current situation. As I said, this kind of thing strikes a pretty big bundle of nerves with me, like with a sledghammer. Got a lot of old issues there.

However, my statment and my caution remain in place: there can be NO good result from trashing the kids' mother or father, regardless of what kind of losers they are, if there's even the slightest chance the kids will hear or feel the bitterness. Only the kids suffer. And they already know they're imposing on your good will, trust me.
 
In fact, reading over my earlier posts, I'm going to apologize for the tone if nothing else. I lashed out pretty good and unloaded more than a little pent-up anger. Laker Girl took undeserved heat for offboard issues and I guess I was doing some venting of my own. Celexa only goes so far, I guess. On further reflection the charge of assholery stands; I will do what I can to correct the offending statements, and maybe make that appointment with the counselor after all...
 
Donovan said:
NOTE: FOR LACK OF EDIT FUNCTION, THIS POST, ORIGINALLY #4 IN SERIES, IS HEREBY RETRACTED FOR EXCESSIVE VITRIOL AND UNDUE ANGER. THE ASSHOLE RESPONSIBLE WISHES TO EXTEND REGRETS FOR THE TONE AND ANGER OF THIS AND OTHER POSTS IN THE SERIES. THANK YOU.

Best I could do under the circumstances. Perhaps if Gagh or one of the other moderators could replace post # 4 and #10 with this statement...
 
Donovan said:
NOTE: FOR LACK OF EDIT FUNCTION, THIS POST, ORIGINALLY #10 IN SERIES, IS HEREBY RETRACTED FOR EXCESSIVE VITRIOL AND UNDUE ANGER. THE ASSHOLE RESPONSIBLE WISHES TO EXTEND REGRETS FOR THE TONE AND ANGER OF THIS AND OTHER POSTS IN THE SERIES. THANK YOU.

Best I could do under the circumstances. Perhaps if Gagh or one of the other moderators could replace post # 4 and #10 with this statement...
 
Dono, don't even sweat it dude. It's good that there are people who think forward and outward about the ramifications that do indeed/ and unfortunately extend towards the children involved. You could have a job in child care bro. But the pay sucks.
 
Actually I work with DD population, but I have a teaching degree and a lot of child/developmental psych background. I'm just apologizing for the earliest two posts, which on reflection were unnecessarily harsh and insulting. I unloaded a whole lot of real world anger on Laker Girl.

Hopefully, she'll see the point I made and stop to consider her own anger when it comes to her brother and his kids, before she does them inadvertant but permanent harm in her 'righteous wrath'...
 
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