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DREAM THREAD Part Pi.Pi!

I was James Bond, specifically the Roger Moore James Bond, I had a bed in my office for some reason, this naked Russian lady was in my bed, I turned around to hang my jacket up and suddenly there was another russian lady sat at a desk typing, I figured this was some sort of trap, so said there would be no shagging unless she joined in, she started to get undressed, dream immediately ends.
 
Nightmare
I was watching a video before falling asleep
Then this person appeared in my dream, and in my bed and it was pretty fucking creepy
 
I also dreamed I worked at a funeral home, when they told me how little I was being paid I couldn't understand why I left my old job, then a female co worker wanted to sleep with me.
 
Had a revolver and needed to put it away but I wasn't where it belonged. And I realized I wasn't where it belonged because I was in my old house that I'd since rented out. I think I put the gun in a drawer anyway. Luckily the guy that lived there was cool about me being there without permission and I was somehow cool about the place being filthy there being a couple large dogs, and some people that weren't on the lease, but I had no memory how I got there and I was wearing long underwear, a T-shirt and possibly socks. We couldn't find my clothes anywhere so I decided to just go try to find my car. Only outside was more like where my apartment in Oregon was and I had no idea where I'd left my car. (Did I have keys? I don't know.) Then I realized I could check my phone and see if there were any clues to what had happened on it (where was I carrying my phone? I don't know.) but the phone was acting flaky, a bit like those old cascading popup viruses you'd get on computers.
 
whisky said:
I was James Bond, specifically the Roger Moore James Bond, I had a bed in my office for some reason, this naked Russian lady was in my bed, I turned around to hang my jacket up and suddenly there was another russian lady sat at a desk typing, I figured this was some sort of trap, so said there would be no shagging unless she joined in, she started to get undressed, dream immediately ends.
Click to expand...
 
Dreamed I had a second house that I didn't know about, I had paused paying the mortgage somehow, and now the house had been valued at 18 billion pounds.
 
I just remembered* I recently dreamed I met Leonard Nimoy (had to have been a dream, what with him being dead and all). The only thing I remember is that I made a subtle jab about his "Bilbo Baggins" song and he acted in such a way that I let the matter drop.

*The Dog was guarding the door to my bedroom, but The Cat usually manages to sneak past to spend most of the night laying on the bed and if I open the back door, he runs out like he's late for an adventure and I realized "Bilbo Baggins" would be a good name for a cat. Then I was like, "Heyyy, that's wild, I was just giving Leonard Nimoy a hard time about that the other day. Wait... "
 
Shit, fair number of wild ones yesterday. Forgot to write them down. Dead tired right now, but one was noteworthy to the point I need to get at least a few details down:

It was a dream that either referenced an earlier dream or my brain created an earlier fictional event. Again, I've lost most of the detail, but the police or someone were looking for some guy and they had a couple photos of them and I realized I'd met him. A friend from college and me had gone on a road trip, as adults, to some college town within road trip distance from his house and couch surfed (because it makes perfect sense that college kids would just welcome Old Dudes into their lives with open arms) for a long holiday weekend, drinking and partying. We'd seen the guy the cops were looking for on a bike or a skateboard at some point.
 
Pretty routine military school dream again. Can't find anything because school is winding down so I've got everything packed AND I have messy roommates. For some reason a big overweight lumberjack looking kid from high school and college is in the course and he's helping me look for a green T-shirt because for some reason I'm wearing my blue pajama T-shirt with my utility uniform. (Also, for some reason it's the old 20th century camouflage pattern instead of the 21st century digitial pattern.) I get disgusted with the mess so I intentionally trample some of the khaki service uniform shirts my roommates have strewn on the floor. Also, also for some reason, I start singing The Gap Band's "I Dropped a Bomb on You" with Big Ed adding the whistling bomb sound, but stop because I suspect it is annoying the crusty major who happens to be in the room too.

When I finally find the T-shirt, I accidentally tip out an old compass I have that no longer works and this interests the major, who thinks it might be valuable and takes it off to "the lab" to have it tested. Meanwhile, I realize I'm also going to need a hat so I send my friend back to get one and he comes back with a black baseball cap. I berate him that I need a camouflage uniform cap and he points out that means we're going to have to go rummage through the locker again. That's about when the dream ends.

Oh, I forgot, there's also some paper that I never completed and won't have time to complete, but I'll probably graduate anyway because apparently no one ever completes the paper properly (with footnotes and sources and everthing).
 
I was at some sort of exhibition where you could play with puppies, I went into a room with sausage dogs, and a bunch of them crawled up my trousers, I had to go to the toilets and extract ten of them from my legs.
 
I think I don't know how to do sex dreams so I wind up doing office dreams. Was supposed to meet 2 girls at a sex club at 6am to sex them. 6am rolled around and I decided it was absurd to go to a sex club at 6am and I must've got my wires crossed. Eventually went but as I was going out the front door, I realized I'd forgot an important part I planned (Or I was coming in the door at a reasonable hour and making sure I didn't forget an important part I'd planned. Pretty much naked at the start but I was wearing, like, Daisy Dukes by the time I got to the back of the place, where I was supposed to meet them.

Next think I know, I'm in an office and can't find my phone. Kept thinking I found it and someone else would go "no, that's my phone." Finding all kinds of things that turned out to not be my phone--some kind of electric dump truck, some Tamagotchi-like thing that, amazingly, was still charged. Then a couple friends who'd also lost their phones used an office phone to call their numbers so I decided to try that too. Don't remember if they were successful, but I think that's when I found the little plastic dump truck.
 
Wild dreams lately, but I either forget them or they're too disturbing to share--and I share some pretty F'ed up ones. A lot more sexualized content of late too. That said, last night's theme was basically doing what you feel like because there are no consequences. One, I was in a job and I was just doing whatever I felt like because I'd put in my notice or something and the other, I was in a class and I knew I was going to quit school without getting a diploma and I'd already missed several important deadlines for the class. But I kept working on the assignments as much as I felt like because I needed something to do. Once in awhile I'd try to submit something where I'd missed several intervening steps and, unsurprisingly, they weren't able to accept it because I'd skipped the other deadlines. Then everyone's getting ready to turn in the final project and it looks remarkably the same for everyone else. Meanwhile I'm working on mine (they were books) with an X-Acto knife, basically turning it into an art statement and the other students are like "what [the hell] are you doing [you lunatic]?"

Awhile back I had one that I'd cut off my genitals while drunk that upset and saddened me quite a bit until I woke up enough to realize it was probably a dream and reach down there and check. The only reason I even mention that one is because the other day I came up with the theory it was related to me apparently giving some neckties to Goodwill at some point. Back when I was a very young adult I got a few vintage neckties at thrift stores. They were that kind of "skinny tie" style that had come back into fashion by then. One was dark red with a minimal print detail on it (kind of hard to describe). The other was silver/black/grey and was rows and rows of embroidered chess men. Other day I was wearing a topcoat I got a couple years ago and went "OOH! One of those old vintage ties I never wear anymore would go great with this!" Upon rummaging my closets, they were nowhere to be found, so I'm forced to conclude that I had a decluttering purge at some point and got rid of them. They're gone for good and I can never get them back and I wish I still had them.
 
I found myself doing a maths exam, the questions were so small I couldn't read them, I finally got the woman running the test to give me a more legible one, then Jackie Cham who was sat next to me kept leaning into the sunlight so my solar powered calculator didn't work.

I was so annoyed I woke up half an hour before my alarm.
 
Last night I managed to get back to sleep after the inevitable 4am bathroom break relatively easily (relatively). Night before felt like I just laid awake until the alarm went off around 7:30. That said, at some point I'd decided since I couldn't sleep I'd go to church. But when I got inside it wasn't my usual church. I thought to myself that it was neat that there was another nearby church that had services at the same time. Then they did communion kind of weird and next I realized I'd accidentally went to the funeral of a little girl I didn't know and they were getting ready to bring her down the center aisle so I discreetly left through a side door.

So obviously I did get back to sleep at some point, but that was the rest of the night--when I *would* get back to sleep I'd dream I was still awake and unable to get to sleep. It kind of doesn't make for a very restful night's sleep.
 
Interesting (to me) one last night. It falls apart on the telling, but if your subconscious is glossing over the plot holes it was kind of interesting:

I'm going to some...thing... with a...friend?...in an apartment building or something. It's local so I decide I can ride my motorcycle to it. As a matter of fact I keep my motorcycle parked in the building's parking garage. Then I realize it is pointless to walk to a parking garage to get my motorcycle just so I can drive around the parking garage or something. But at least I can make sure the bike is alright.

The bike is tucked into a corner of the garage, which is good because then it will be harder to steal by loading into a pickup or something. Still, I kind of wish I'd remembered to use a chain or cable lock to lock it to something. We're about to head off to the...thing when someone in a nearby lot asks me to move some engine parts. You see, a different friend has asked if he can store his engine in my parking spot and instead it's in the neighbor's spot. Before I can start moving things, she just starts scooping them up and moving them. I'm trying to stop her, because they are pretty clearly laid out in order to make reassembly easier but it's too late. The best I can do is move some of his tools. But apparently the boxes they're in are the neighbor's and a lot of the tools are shrink-wrapped to the boxes. My brother's helping me remove the shrink-wrap but he doesn't know the trick to it so I have to show him.

Before this is done my friend has to go home and I agree to follow as soon as I'm done. But I get lost and instead wind up in a bar in the apartment building. For whatever reason the bar closes at 9:30 and everyone's telling me I'm going to have to leave soon. Then they're telling the bar staff they'd better lock the doors soon or new patrons will get in and jeering at them because they were too slow. One of the waitresses is kicking me out and I go out the wrong way and they won't let me back in so I'll have to find my...car? by circling around. She at least gives me directions and I'm going to have to get across a major freeway that is connected the other way by an underground tunnel. Someone local agrees to go with me and help me find the way but I'm not thrilled by this BS and worried I'll be late for...something?
 
I dream a lot after the alarm has gone off, between snooze alarms.

Sleep pattern is: Try to be in bed between 11 and midnight. Wind up waking up around 5 to use the bathroom and taking an hour or so most of the time to drift back to sleep. I'll usually dream about being awake until I have a dream about being awake that is impossible enough that I realize I'm finally asleep. Last night I was feeling around in a bag for something. Grabbed a plastic bottle or something and was trying to figure out what it was and how it got in the bag. Woke up enough to realize I was grabbing my pillow and quickly tried not to wake back up the rest of the way.

Alarm goes off around 7:30 and I have a snooze that goes off every 15 minutes. Trying (after working nights for too long) to get back on a sleep schedule where I am out of bed before 8. More like 9 today. The little 15 minute dreams are odd but mundane. This morning I was with a group of people who met James Callis and one of them told him I had a cat named Gaius Frakkin Baltar and that I should show him to the actor. Callis agreed so I called the cat and surprisingly he came running. Only it turned out to be a dog. It was smaller and thinner than my dog but heavier than my cat. Eventually Callis got to meet his namesake and was very polite and patient about it.
 
Ye gods, 2 awesome dreams last night. (Sadly the 2nd must not have been that awesome because I've forgotten it, so unless it comes up as I type up the other one, it is lost.)

I had a rare pre-4:20am bathroom break dream that was mundane but long and memorable and idiosycratic. I was both young enough to be riding in the back of a car with my parents and my brother and old enough to have my current dog. We were at some family thing. It was either a reunion of some kind or maybe a ski trip. At any rate, on the way home my sleep routine was all screwed up and it was just about time to go to sleep but also time for a meal an hour or two later. Not my decision to make. I doze off and next thing I know we're in a restaurant. I'm apparently wearing a polo shirt with pajama bottoms. Everyone else gets their food but somehow they never took my order. I catch the waitresses attention and point this out and she's like "yeah, well, I'm busy. I'll get to you in an hour and a half or so." So I get pissed off and stomp out. Mom doesn't want me to make a scene but fuck it. It's pouring down out. I find some kind of little mall that has bar/restaurants across the corridor from each other and pick one. Some guy who may or may not be a bouncer comes over and points out I'm not dressed properly for the place and I explain that I just need calories to put in my face hole. A couple girls say this somehow sounds dirty but maybe there isn't anything wrong with it and I also tell the bouncer guy enough of my story that he decides to get me some calories. It's some kind of nondescript assortment of potato/bread/cheese/dressing that is served to me directly onto the counter. I figure I'll tip them $5 for hooking me up when I notice a bill for $12 or so and I'm not sure how I feel about $12 for random slop served onto the counter. Anyway I start to tell one of the girls that I used to dress much nicer than the dress code for this place when some douche interrupts with his own story because he's obviously trying to score points with the girl. By the time he's done talking the conversation has moved beyond my point but goddammit, I'm going to make it anyway so I painfully circle back to explain that now I have a dog so the minute I step out my door my feet are wet and I'm covered with mud and snagged with briars so there's no point in dressing nice anymore.

That's about all I remember. And the other dream didn't come back to me. It was similarly mundane but creepily long and detailed.
 
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