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SPAMCAPITAL OMEGA: THE REMAKE OF THE REMAKE OF THE SPAM

He had frisked into the sitting-room, and was now standing
there: perfectly winded.
 
"There's the saucepan that the gruel was in!" cried
Scrooge, starting off again, and going round the fireplace.
"There's the door, by which the Ghost of Jacob Marley
entered!
 
There's the corner where the Ghost of Christmas Present,
sat! There's the window where I saw the wandering Spirits!
It's all right, it's all true, it all happened. Ha ha ha!"
 
Really, for a man who had been out of practice for so
many years, it was a splendid laugh, a most illustrious laugh.
The father of a long, long line of brilliant laughs!
 
"I don't know what day of the month it is!" said Scrooge.
"I don't know how long I've been among the Spirits.
 
I don't know anything. I'm quite a baby. Never mind.
I don't care. I'd rather be a baby. Hallo! Whoop!
Hallo here!"
 
He was checked in his transports by the churches ringing
out the lustiest peals he had ever heard. Clash, clang,
hammer; ding, dong, bell. Bell, dong, ding; hammer, clang,
clash! Oh, glorious, glorious!
 
Running to the window, he opened it, and put out his
head. No fog, no mist; clear, bright, jovial, stirring, cold;
cold, piping for the blood to dance to; Golden sunlight;
Heavenly sky; sweet fresh air; merry bells. Oh, glorious!
Glorious!
 
"What's to-day!" cried Scrooge, calling downward to a
boy in Sunday clothes, who perhaps had loitered in to look
about him.
 
"EH?" returned the boy, with all his might of wonder.
 
"What's to-day, my fine fellow?" said Scrooge.
 
"To-day!" replied the boy. "Why, CHRISTMAS DAY."
 
"It's Christmas Day!" said Scrooge to himself. "I haven't
missed it. The Spirits have done it all in one night.
 
They can do anything they like. Of course they
can. Of course they can. Hallo, my fine fellow!"
 
"Do you know the Poulterer's, in the next street
but one, at the corner?" Scrooge inquired.
 
"I should hope I did," replied the lad.
 
"An intelligent boy!" said Scrooge. "A remarkable boy!
Do you know whether they've sold the prize Turkey that
was hanging up there?--Not the little prize Turkey: the
big one?"
 
"What, the one as big as me?" returned the boy.
 
"What a delightful boy!" said Scrooge. "It's a pleasure
to talk to him. Yes, my buck!"
 
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