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A new Doctor Dave story

"Why of course not," says Mister Kitty. "I am, after all, a sentient talking cat. AND your boss. Now, I have another job for you. Some dogs chased me today. I need you to kick the shit out of them."

"SIR, YES SIR," says Doctor Dave, saluting.
 
Doctor Dave wakes in bed again.

"What the hell is going on? Why do I keep having such strange dreams?"

A shadowy figure steps out of the shadows.

"Hello there," she says. It's the blond woman with long legs from the very start of this thread!!

"YOU!" says Doctor Dave.

"ME!" she says, smiling widly. She looks high. On drugs.

"What have you done to me?"

"Oh, just slipped a little something into your drink...hehe."

"But...I can't remember..."

"Think hard, Dave."

"I was in the bar...had a job, talking to you, your husband wanted to know if you were cheating..."

"I NEVER CHEATED! I just talked to guys in bars. Sometimes let them touch me up. Sometimes gave them blowjobs. But NEVER full sex!"

"Sounds like cheating to me, sister!"

"RRRR! That's not the last thing you should be able to remember anyway..."

"Well there was the man with AIDS who was in love with me...and the talking cat...but that was all a dream...come to think of it, the man with AIDS was looking for a cat too...cats...hmmm...I remember! I went to the bar the next day and there was a cat sitting there! And I was confused, because it's not often you see a cat in a bar."

"I PUT THAT CAT THERE."

"Why? And why are you shouting?"

"I put it there to distract you while I slipped CONFUSO-DRUGS into your drink!"

"You bitch. I don't usually hit women, but I have a good mind to give you a Stone Cold Stunner!"

"Try it!"

"I will...I can't get up! Where are my legs?"

"I CHOPPED THEM OFF!"

"Ah shit!"
 
Dr Dave's legs to be served to him as sandwich meat? Or are they already attached to some legless robot whose only dream was to walk?
 
But what about that poor legless robot? Please won't someone think of the legless robots?
 
After: would've really highlighted your skills as a surgeon.
Before: I'm not impressed.
 
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