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DREAM THREAD Part Pi.Pi!

OK. Kinda busy these days but part of last night's dream cannot be skipped: I have to take a test. For some reason people taking the test are grouped at round coffee tables of a library/student lounge type space. There is one or more laptops to take the test on (it changes during the dream and the laptop never actually gets used). And before we can take the test we have to read this crossover comic book Wolverine is in. It's an iconic comic I've seen dozens of times but never actually done more than page through it. That said, somehow everyone else in the group finishes it quickly and is stuck waiting for me and not only have I not finished it, I periodically realize I've somehow skipped over a bunch of pages and need to figure out what I read last and read the rest. Everyone's getting cranky. I go to the bathroom and when I get back my comic is missing. Now everyone's really pissed and I wind up grabbing my oldest best friend by the throat over something he said to me. I stomp off to keep looking and a bunch of other people from high school are grouped around a big conference room table like you'd see at a gaming convention with boxes and boxes of comic books and one of the people who was OK but kind of a dick admits they swiped my comic book as a prank and give it back when I ask. But I'm suspicious so I go through the bundle of stuff they hand me. There's one comic book that isn't the one I need and a bunch of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle posters that are glued onto cardboard sheets and cut to make kind of "stand-ee's". I point out that the comic book isn't there and it turns out different groups got different comic books. Eventually I give up and decide we need to just wing this test so my friend (that I choked and is pissed at me) tells us to roll dice. Then he gets mad because I use one of my own dice instead of the ones he has. He starts picking dice out of the shoebox we're for some reason rolling them in along with a bunch of those rubbery eraser topper things. That's about where the dream ended.
 
I'm in hospital, I seem to be waiting for hours, a nurse finally comes to see me, but turns out she is talking to someone sat in front of me. I fall asleep in the dream and wake up in a car with an aunt and uncle long gone. Two young men are in the front seats who I don't know, they seem arrogant and a bit racist, the car doesn't have wheels but hovers, at the first traffic lights they increase the height so we are above the traffic.

They take a short cut through a church where black people are putting on a play they think it's hilarious flying over them while I sit in the back horrified.

We fly out and I guess it's winter now as I am on the bonnet somehow wearing a seat belt while they make me throw snowballs at people.

Later we drove near the river but the road collapsed, the car sank into the river with me still on the bonnet my head under the water, we passed other sunk cars.

We got back on dry land and I ran to the back of the car, despite not being in their before, my wife and son were in the car both drowned, I cursed our the car driver and his stupid flying car, then I gave them both the kiss of life and they were ok.
 
That was your dream?! Fuckin A I would not like that at all. *This was directed to Volpone regarding the presidential dream*

I've been having dreams that are so real that I question the next day whether or not I actually talked to people or saw them.
 
Well here is my once a year shooting dream that I must have. (Just kidding about the once a year part,I hope I never have this dream again)

I am pet sitting, minding my own business as I do and I hear the doorbell. I go to the door, it is a double door-there is a small mud room. I get to the outer door but I guess I can't tell who it is. For some reason even tho it seems like the doors and windows are glass?
Anyway I open up the door and I gasp! It is Santa Claus, only not jovial Santa. But also I think it is my friend Mark. But from a long time ago.

My first image of this Santa Claus character-I guess there is a beard, everything is as it seems it should be but then I begin to notice that it is a black shirt and brown beard and at first round, but then it slims down.
I don't invite this person in but the shove past me and ask if we can talk for a few minutes. I get immediate weird vibes from the person and say no and I lie and say I'm about to feed myself and the animals, apparently it is more than just a cat and dog, it may be chickens too.
The man goes outside.
And disappears. I see and hear children in the street and it is snowing-even tho it is Marh in my dream-or at least it def isn't Christmas in my dream

And then I see him
Through the glass
looking at me through a gun
and I scream at first in surprise
and then I scream out loud through the open door for help from the kids, when I notice it seemed no one heard or responded I try to reach for my phone in my pocket and go inside the house, only I leave the fucking doors open. Why
he has already fired one round at me
I think he has a scope
I am fucking terrified.

Oh yeah, when he was leaving the first time-and as he was going down the steps I asked him if he was Mark. That is telling me he had some sort of disguise on-Santa but not jovial and he just said, "Yeah" and he pointed to a scar on his face. Lower chin-
like did I cause that? What the fuck was it? And if he is "Mark" how do I actually know him and remember him?

And now-why has he come to kill me?

I try to make my way into the kitchen and I think I am going to head down some stairs at some point and I am still grabbing for my phone and I guess the dog I am watching is useless.

Why do I leave the doors open?

I struggle to get my phone out of my pocket and he can still see me through the windows, I am doomed

I wake up.
 
A fairly routine version of the military reservist dream this morning. The high points are that, for some reason, I decided to wear the old pre-2001 camouflage uniform and I'm outside without a hat (which is a big faux pas in a military uniform). On 2 occasions I have very junior enlisted people disrespect me, forcing me to chew their asses out (one was clearly some kind of reservist because he was fat and old and had a rank a 20 year old kid would have). When I go back for a hat I decide it would be simpler if I just wore the current uniform but I can't find any pants. I realize I must've wore holes in the knees, etc. I'm thinking about if I can just pick up new uniforms at the store and realize my name won't be embroidered on them but I also realize I've got the tops and the name on the pants is over a seat pocket so it will be covered by the top. I'm just about to go see if they have my size in stock when I wake up.
 
Another violent dream
I'm not going to think much of this one
Strange tho because I didn't watch any show or videos that I recall that were similar.

I was at a corporate event where there was dancing.
And then we were at a bank where there was a mass shootout with large guns
I witnessed one guy get killed, I witnessed several, but this one stuck with me
and then I was in the parking lot and people were there in their vehicles I got into one
and he just started driving
and it was apparent he went home after the dancing, changed his clothes and missed the shootout
I was in the backseat, someone else was in the front also, but I don't know who.

Fucking strange.
 
Had some kind of...wait, it's coming back to me. I thought it was a military dream, but it was really more of a...like, high school and going down to see the state wrestling tournament type dream. Traveling somewhere and stopped at some hotel/motel. Semi-unplanned. There may have been some kind of convention going on there. Instead of a restaurant they had kind of a old (not cool retro but time capsule that was dug up) cafeteria. All these 20something girls that were secretaries or cheerleaders or whoever had booked a big chunk of the rooms were all in there eating. I was trying to get a room but it was problematic. Then when I went to pay for it with my credit card...the card reader was like a little credit card?...with a kind of insert to it?...anyway it got knocked off the front desk and slid down the hallway where someone picked it up and handed it back to me to take to the clerk. That was the morning dream.

But what was really interesting is that I had a dream before 1am. Maybe I always have dreams at that hour but I definitely don't remember them. But this time I woke up from the dream. Busy street outside the house and from the traffic noises I thought it might be like, 6am or later. (I don't have a clock I can read in the dark right now.) Didn't want to get up if that was the case because then you gotta decide if you wanna try to get back to sleep but I couldn't get back to sleep so I decided to get up and use the bathroom. A bit odd that The Dog didn't want to go Out like she usually does--until I saw the clock on the stove and realized it wasn't even 1am yet.

Anyway, on to the dream: Actually there isn't a lot of detail. Sexy dream. There's some kind of backwoods strip-joint or karaoke bar and I bump into a couple floozies who are coming from it and because of the rules of the place they'd had to take their clothes off (for some reason this was kind of 1990s TV sitcom implied nudity where I knew they were supposed to be nude but you really couldn't see anything) and I decide I HAD to go there and sing (or whatever) because then I'd have an ironclad excuse to take my clothes off in public and walk around nekkid. That's about all there was to it. I think I woke up while I was waiting for my turn.
 
Occasionally I have really awesome dreams where I am riding a motor bike around back country roads.

This one even had my deceased ex and I didn't mind.
The tricky part was a recurring one where I am at this convenience store and there are 3 different doors to choose from and I never know the correct way to go.

Then I groggily wake up and my curtain looks like Groot
 
This morning was one that started like a documentary but I transitioned into a character in it and it just became Real Life. Apparently there's this military base where one of the gates is just 2 miles, cross-country, from some town. So it is easy to rob the bank there and then drive your car off a bridge and cut across country to the town to evade capture. So that's what we were doing. Only pretty soon a cheetah started stalking one of us so we had to deal with that. Then, when we got to the town it was like, some kind of "Jeopardy!" enclave. I dunno, ex-contestants? Aspiring contestants? Clue writers? At any rate the bar was having some kind of trivia night. Only it was a sexy trivia night. Unfortunately I woke up before anything risque happened.
 
Fucking bee dream
They were everywhere

First thing wrong was I was at a church service
Met a guy
With long hair
Soft curly waves
Then I went to his place
And apparently he keeps bees
A plate sits on his desk with a hive like thing
But the bees
 
I fucking wake up at 3 AM and tap that shit out on my phone and then go to sleep and continue to have strange dreams, but its those first ones that bite the dust
 
A couple fragments from last night. Relatively mundane content but not things I typically dream: One, I don't really know any detail. I'm amid a group of a few dozen strangers. For some reason I decide to start singing the first lines of "Shoop" by Salt n' Pepa and about half the crowd join in. I realize I really only know the first few lines or so but enough people know the words that they're able to keep going. Meanwhile the other half of the crowd has lined up on these kind of bleachers or steps and are actually dancing the choreography from the video. Kind of an unplanned flash-mob.

The other dream, now that I think about it, was probably driven by the storm last night, combined with different animals sleeping on my bed at different points in the night. I wake up to check what time it is. Astonishingly, 2 of my broken wind-up alarm clocks are also on the dresser and actually working. (The clockwork in wind-up alarm clocks wears out and the clock stops working. This happens even more quickly with the cheap clocks that are all you can find today--and even a cheap wind-up clock is hard to find.) The really weird thing is that I wasn't drinking heavily last night and I have no recollection of digging out those clocks, getting them to work, and putting them next to the electric clock. Of course at this point my bedroom has also become my bedroom from 5th grade to senior year of high school. The drawers are all full of old clothes that I don't wear anymore but didn't throw away or donate. My brother is sleeping in his bedroom next door and my cat (and possibly my dog) are in the house. There's another cat and I'm surprised that my Mom would've gotten a cat (because of course nobody is ever dead in dreams).
 
I just dreamt that the power went out
I got my headlamp off the night stand and attempted to go back to sleep, but then my sister was there and it was bizarre and she was acting strange and it was a little frightening
I woke up in real life and the power was not off
And I was alone
 
I dreamed I was on holiday in Spain, then we decided to spontaneously go on a different holiday from their to somewhere else, only that place turned out to be not as good.
 
I had a dream where I was flying and trying to find my way back home, more and more people became aware I was flying and I had to get away from them, then they sent Homelander after me, and I didn't have any other powers apart from flying, so it didn't end well.
 
OK. I've been having dreams. Sometimes they're even noteworthy and I remember them, but with this job after almost 11 months of retirement I have no time to fart around jotting them down, but I did have one snippet last night that is so absolutely bonkers that I have to share it:

I don't remember the dream or any of the context. Apart from it was one of those moments where you encounter another hipster so you need to impress them with your hipster cred. So we were talking about how great Prince was and the other hipster was going on about how much he loved Prince so I decided to utterly blow his socks off, since I have "Purple Rain" in spray bottle form. WhatTheWhat? you say? You know how, in Olden Dayes, music came on albums and albums came on CDs? And before that they came on LPs? And there were cassettes and even 8-track tapes? Well in my dream apparently you could get them in a spray bottle like Windex glass cleaner.

So I'm stalling, making small talk while I rummage through the cabinet for the spray bottle. I'm having a hard time finding it and I've got to make sure the conversation gets to just the right point when I whip it out and blow his socks off. At about this point some other, more rational, part of my brain got involved and (rightfully) pointed out that albums have never come in spray bottle form and the whole idea is completely silly so it turned out that it was only, like, some kind of Prince licensed surface cleaner that had the "Purple Rain" album cover reproduced on it, but still, that's some pretty cool hipster obscure merchandise.
 
Shitfuck. I remembered last night's dreams for quite awhile. But I didn't write them down until now, so I've mostly forgotten them. It was a variation on the "having a stupid job" dream, only I wasn't as useless and irrelevant in it as usual, the job was more useless and irrelevant. There were 2 different ones but I only remember anything about one of them. We'll see how much comes back as I type: In the 1990s I was a temp as a shipping clerk for a paper warehouse. I think we sold paper in the dream and the warehouse manager was the boss, but other than that all similarity ended (I have never seen "Office Space," btw). Yep. It's coming back. I worked at this office. And for some reason I'd come to work in my jammies and shave and get dressed etc on the clock. We had some big "all hands" meeting and I had plenty of time but for some reason everyone was using the bathroom so I couldn't get ready--even though I'd allowed plenty of time. Eventually everyone is heading down for the meeting so I jump in the bathroom to get dressed. I know people will be pissed but I'm hoping they'll just start without me. I'm trying to do something with my hair when people start shouting for me so I just throw some water on it and push it around and hope for the best and head down. We're in some big lobby/foyer with chocolate brown 12" tile floor and a big glass window on one side. There's a reception desk and maybe stairs on each side of it up to the next level--it's like a 20-30' ceiling space. There's a kind of conversation nook arrangement with tables and 2x2' wood blocks for stools and maybe some other geometric shapes for style and everyone's gathered there. There may or may not be a big TV and some kind of AV setup. That's about all I remember. Oh, and all my coworkers are, like, in their early 20s. I'm probably in my mid 30s instead of my real age, but I'm definitely older and a bit of an outsider.
 
Some kind of romantic comedy this morning. I'm hanging out with some girl I have a crush on, doing romantic comedy montage things. She bought a calendar for her place so I'm helping her hang it and I point out that I couldn't hang it where I'm going to if she weren't so tall and she points out that she's like, 5'. I realize that she is 5'. Then she (or someone else) points out the song I made a reference to isn't on the album I thought it was and I realize I was wrong about that too. Finally, it turns out the girl I have a crush on is a lesbian and already has a girlfriend.
 
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